Sideswipe

A couple of Romanian tourists stopped two Aucklanders on the edge of Lake Tarawera to ask where they could find the pink and white terraces. Their brochure clearly showed a picture of the terraces, famous in their time as the eighth wonder of the world. The Aucklanders explained that the Romanians were 120 years too late and pointed to Mt Tarawera, explaining how it erupted and the lava covered the terraces. The Romanians looked slightly bewildered and wandered off, leaving the Aucklanders wondering about false advertising.

* * *

It's no surprise that following the critical success of gay cowboy film Brokeback Mountain, some Hollywood producer is now thinking of a lady-lovin' version based on the life of Dusty Springfield. Charlize Theron (who played a dyke serial killer in Monster) is rumoured to be taking the role of Dusty, and in her film debut, model Kate "Cocaine" Moss will play the singer's first lover.

* * *

Lew Daltry of Green Bay gets fired up about yesterday's story about resin facial features being nailed to trees for decoration. "The pathetic people who think they can improve on nature, and exhibit their retarded sense of humour by driving nails into trees to display their revolting kitsch, deserve to have nails driven into them. The results would be similar. In humans the wounds produce blood, in trees sap, latex or resin. In both cases the punctures are likely to induce infections, in the case of trees frequently lethal fungi. And if the nails are driven well in, the timber may be harmed."

* * *

Keith Hamilton of Milford says the picture of the cars sandwiched together in Paris may not be as silly as it looks. He writes: "I saw exactly the same thing in inner-city London and I was told the cars belonged to local residents who didn't need the vehicles during the week because they either walked to work or used public transport. At the weekend the co-operation of everyone was required so cars could be accessed but this inconvenience was tolerated because the bumper-to-bumper parking virtually eliminated car theft."