Sideswipe

Opinion

Dentists tell the New York Times they are increasingly seeing the effects of methamphetamine use in patients, known in industry circles as "meth mouth". The description of the grotty pegs from the Times: "Healthy teeth turn greyish-brown and begin to fall out, and take on a peculiar texture less like that of hard enamel and more like that of a piece of ripened fruit." (Source: News of the Weird)

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A reader writes: "Surely it's time to become a republic after the appalling show of sporting one-sidedness at the second All Blacks vs Lions test, where Prince William proudly wore his Lions jersey ... Isn't he supposed to represent us, too?" (To be fair, William showed up for training with the All Blacks yesterday. Maybe he's switching to the winning side.) Meanwhile Auckland Mayor Dick Hubbard has made a rash promise: If Auckland lose to the Lions tonight, he will throw himself off the Sky Tower. To make it slightly more interesting, Dick, why not ask Hucker to tie the knot?

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Murray Hunter says it is absurd that the passport authorities don't allow smiling, but men can sport a beard. "My passport photo shows me in a full beard whereas I am now clean-shaven. But because I'm looking serious it is still legal. The men customs officers look at the photo and then at me three times, whether in Australia or at Auckland Airport. The women customs officers always look once and say, 'It's you - the eyes are the same' ... When my passport expires in 18 months, after my photo, or several of them, are taken, I may re-grow my beard to prove the stupidity again."

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A reader writes: "My wife was having coffee in Robert Harris, Botany Town Centre, with her mum and our 2-week-old baby. Said baby started to get upset, so my wife took baby home, but left her handbag behind. It wasn't until the following morning that she realised it was missing. A few minutes later the doorbell rang. Courier Post was there with a package - the handbag had been returned. Hooray! Not quite ... The package included the following note: 'Dear Sue, I was having coffee in Robert Harris yesterday when I found your handbag. I had a look through it and found a lot of things that I thought you would think important so I have returned it to you. I took the $80 cash that was in your purse as a finder's fee because I'm poor. I hope you don't mind. Kind regards, Random Stranger.'"

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The remarkable effort one woman went to looking for her beloved Tonkinese cat Mickey has paid off. Owner Priscilla led an exhaustive search, initiated a comprehensive direct-mail campaign and even sent maps of the Mt Wellington area to internationally renowned animal behaviourists, to try to find Mickey, who'd taken off after Priscilla and her partner, Paul, shifted house. Two weeks later, he has been found safe and well.