Sideswipe

Celebrity Endorsement Idea No 645. (Source: Galleryoftheabsurd.typepad.com)

The biggest problem with Labour's 20 hours a week free childcare for 3- and 4-year-olds is that parents don't know if their present childcare provider is a community-based centre, which is entitled to the free hours, or a privately owned centre, which is not entitled. But it seems Labour itself is also confused. Following National's more direct, across-the-board childcare rebate announcement, the Government has switched into overdrive, announcing the Auckland benefits of the scheme from Kids Ahead Early Learning Centre in Pt Chevalier. Oddly, this childcare centre is listed as privately owned on the Ministry of Education's website.

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National MP for Epsom Richard Worth sent out the following Maori phrase in his weekly campaigning email: "Raiona ki runga te marae. Hipi ki roto te whare Paremata", offering to take the fifth person who correctly translated it out for dinner. Worth's email translated it as "Lambs on the marae. Lions in the House of Parliament", referring to the style of the Labour Party Maori Members of Parliament. Shortly afterward, a correction ... the quote actually translates to "Lions on the marae. Lambs in the House of Parliament." Which isn't quite the sentiment Worth was after.

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At the official launch of the National Party's new election bus (codename: the Natmobile) destined for a pre-election national tour, lucky driver John Godfrey must've thought all his Christmases had come at once when Nick Smith replaced his Ritchies Coachlines tie with a smart new National Party tie. If he keeps them on the right side of the road, maybe he'll get a matching pair of socks?

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Destiny Church's Brian Tamaki wasn't the only one to say something stupid after the London bombings last Thursday. During Fox News' coverage of the Tube and bus bombs, Washington managing editor Brit Hume told host Shepard Smith that his "first thought" when he "heard there had been this attack" and saw the low futures market, was "Hmmm, time to buy".

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At first, a couple of sheep mysteriously jumped to their deaths off a cliff. Then, as stupefied shepherds in the Turkish town of Gevas watched, 1500 more did the same, one after the other. Only 450 died, their bodies creating a kind of woolly mattress for the others. (Source: Newsday.com)