Sideswipe

The sign on the door of the Whangamata police station on New Year's Day bears testimony to a busy night.

How heartening it was to see Greenpeace's clipboard squad out on a rain-lashed Queen St soliciting members to help save the environment. Good luck to them getting dosh from folks probably preferring to dig deep for tsunami victims. Given the events of past weeks - and frankly the weather - perhaps Greenpeace should wait until the environment starts acting like it deserves saving.

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Elaine of Howick thinks the Super Loo isn't so super: "On Wednesday we stopped for refreshments and a visit to the 'Super Loo' in Cambridge. The usual 20c per person was paid to the attendant for use of the 'Super Loo' but the 'Ladies' soap dispensers were both empty. The attendant was told about the problem yet on our return journey on Friday the soap dispensers were still empty!

Someone had put up a notice apologising for the inconvenience and saying that the contractors would be coming on Monday, January 10.

Couldn't the attendant have gone down to the local shops and purchased a couple of plastic pump action dispensers and a container of liquid soap? Incidentally, there was no rebate on the 20c charge."

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Miffed at the impersonal and formulaic HR rejection letter, this reader decided to reject his latest rejection:

Initial rejection:

Dear Mr Maestro,

Thank you for your CV applying for the position of National Sales Manager dated 12 December 2004.

After careful consideration of yours and many other CVs, I regret to inform you we are unable to offer you the position you applied for.

This year we have been fortunate to receive a large number of CVs from very well qualified applicants, and unfortunately your credentials do not meet all our needs at this time.

Rest assured I am keeping your CV on file, should the position become available again.

Best of luck with your future job applications.

Sincerely,
HR Dept.

Rejector's response:

Dear Human Resources Person,

Thank you for your rejection letter dated 23 December 2004.

After careful consideration of yours and many other rejection letters, I regret to inform you I am unable to accept your offer to reject my application for the position I applied for.

This year, I have been fortunate to receive a large number of rejection letters from various companies, and unfortunately your rejection letter does not meet all my needs at this time.

Therefore, I will assume the position in your department in two weeks' time.

Rest assured, I am keeping your rejection letter on file, should my position of being rejectable come available again.

Best of luck rejecting future applicants.

See you in two weeks.

Sincerely,
The Maestro