Sideswipe

Twenty things to do before George W. Bush's second-term inauguration:

1. Drink a nice clean glass of water.
2. Cash your social security cheque.
3. See a doctor of your own choosing.
4. Spend quality time with your draft-age child or grandchild.
5. Get that gas mask you've been putting off buying.
6. Hoard petrol.
7. Take out library books before they're banned.
8. Get that abortion you've always wanted.
9. If you have an idea for an art piece involving a crucifix - do it now.
10. Jam in all the Alzheimer's stem cell research you can.
11. Stay out late before the curfews start.
12. Go and see Bruce Springsteen before he has his "accident".
13. Go and see Mount Rushmore before the Dubya/Reagan additions.
14. Use the phrase: "you can't do that - this is America".
15. Attend a commitment ceremony with gay friends.
16. Take a factory tour anywhere in the US.
17. Try to take photographs of animals on the endangered species list.
18. Visit Florida before the polar ice caps melt.
19. Visit Nevada before it becomes radioactive.
20. Visit Alaska before "the Big Spill".

(Source: poeticleanings.blogspot.com)

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Wellington has more places to eat and drink per head of population than New York, gushes promotional website Wellingtonnz.com. However, blogger Vile File thinks it's lies, all lies. She writes: "When compared with both New York State (.0029) [Numbers in brackets refer to the number of eating/drinking establishments per capita] and New York City (.0028), Wellington (.0026) does not 'have more bars/restaurants per capita than New York'.

But Auckland does, and indeed, using this kind of reasoning, so do most small New Zealand towns. For example, Rahotu, a small Taranaki town, has a resident population of 297. With two food/drink establishments (Rahotu Joe's Dairy and Takeaway, and the Rahotu Tavern), this gives Rahotu .0067 establishments per capita, or in other words, this would be the equivalent of 67 eateries per 10,000 people. This is more than 2.5 times that of Wellington, and more than double that of New York City."

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US television network Fox says it covered up the naked rear end of a cartoon character recently because of nervousness over what the Federal Communications Commission would find objectionable. During a rerun of Family Guy , Fox blurred out a character's naked bottom, even though the image was seen five years ago when the episode first aired.

(Source: San Francisco Gate)

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Linda Thompson writes: "A 'Waihitian' has long been considered a resident of the fine old Hauraki town of Waihi, more particularly a bikini-clad, sun-bronzed resident of the idyllic Waihi Beach. It sounds so much better than the alternative 'Waihethan' ... "

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Ted overboard? A reader has found a child's teddy bear after returning to Oakura from a fishing trip to Cape Brett a week after the Fullers ferry ran aground. "If some child has been going to bed each night believing that his/her favourite teddy went down with the ship and has ended up eaten by fish or seagulls he/she can be reassured that teddy is safe and well," write the rescuers.

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