Christchurch mosque terror attack sentencing: Why some families, victims won't attend

When mass murderer and terrorist Brenton Tarrant is brought into the courtroom for the start of his sentencing tomorrow, dozens of grieving victims and relatives will be there to look him in the eye.

But Farid Ahmed won't be one of them.

The widower doesn't need or want to be in court because it won't make any difference to him.

He has already forgiven the mass murderer and has faith that justice will be served.

Hundreds of people will be in court for the start of the four-day sentencing, many victims themselves or grieving loved ones of the 51 people who were killed.

Sixty-six will read victim impact statements.

Some have flown in from overseas and spent time in managed isolation in the lead-up to sentencing.

But some people, like Ahmed, have chosen not to attend and have never been to court since Tarrant was arrested.

They are simply not interested in the prosecution.

They all have their own reasons.

For Ahmed, being part of the court process was never going to bring him the peace and healing he needed.

His wife Husna was gunned down in the attack - she was running back into the mosque to find him after ushering all the children and women to safety when she was murdered.

Within hours, Ahmed knew only one thing would help him survive and move forward with his life, and it wasn't criminal justice.

Farid and Husna Ahmed at their Christchurch home. This is the last photo taken of her before she was killed. Photo / supplied

Three days after the massacre, Ahmed told the Herald he had forgiven Brenton Tarrant, the man who killed Husna and 50 other men, women and children and wounded dozens more.

He has never wavered from that.

"I still cry for my wife - for my love for her," he said.

"I have a feeling of sadness for my beloved Muslim brothers and sisters who were killed brutally, and for those injured by the bullets - and the families ... my love and prayers are with them.

"But for my healing and the peace in mind, I never depended on what he would say in the court.

"His bullets and killing spoke loud enough."

Ahmed said he found peace and healing through faith and did not rely on any outside process for that.

"Therefore, I do not see any reasons to go to the court to hear what he has to say," he explained.

"I believe the justice system will do its job to control the crime.

"I lost my loved ones, and I know how awful it is, and I do not want the killing to be repeated on any human.

"But to stop more killing, I used my tragedy to work harder for promoting peace and harmony, to remove misunderstanding and hatred through meeting, speaking, writing and any other way possible."

Husna Ahmed is buried in an East Christchurch cemetery alongside her other slain brothers and sisters. Photo / Alan Gibson

Ahmed said while Tarrant had committed a "horrendous crime", he had no hate for the man.

"I have respect for the justice system, and all those who are seeking justice," he said.

"I wish well for all.

"I pray for guidance to change [Tarrant's] heart from hate to love, from violence to peace," he said.

"I pray that his conscience wakes up and makes him realise how he ruined himself and others."

Ahmed said his faith was strong and he had turned to Quranic teaching to get him through his darkest days.

"I had choices either to seek punishment or to forgive," he said.

"I chose the path of forgiveness, without any expectation."

Since the attack, Ahmed had tried to focus on the positives - the reaction and support from New Zealand and beyond.

"For grieving with us, for their love and compassion towards us," he said.

Farid Ahmed addressing Friday prayers a year after the mosque attack on March 13, 2020. Photo / Supplied

"That unity made me feel that I am not alone.

"I feel proud for Kiwis, for their reaction with love and compassion, they are known as a role model of peace on this planet."

Ahmed said the sentencing did not mean closure for him.

He already found that after he forgave the killer and began sharing his message of peace and unity.

He speaks regularly in the community and has attended events around the world delivering his remarkable message.

He also wrote a book as a tribute to his wife in the hopes more people would understand his almost unfathomable decision to offer love to the killer.

"I have been enjoying the peace in my heart because my heart is free from anger or hate," he explained.

"I was able to divert my emotion to be constructive in my life.

"My inner peace allowed me to spread the message of no hate but love, no killing but caring all over the world, and giving peace talks regularly in every way possible.

"For me, I could not have focused in those positive works if I was focused in the court process.

"My daughter and I took the forgiveness path and we found it very rewarding."

Farid Ahmed speaking about the murder of his wife three days after the Christchurch terror attack. Photo / Alan Gibson

Ahmed said New Zealand had come a long way since the March 15 attack.

But here - and around the world - there was more work to do to prevent similar attacks in the future.

"To stop killing, we need to break barriers, communicate more, know more about each other, not to be afraid of waving and smiling at one another," he said.

"We need more peace talks, more dialogues, more efforts to integrate for a harmonious society, to keep an eye on one and other for safety.

"We must work hard to win hearts to prevent killing and violence in our peaceful land New Zealand.

"Please, let us share our hands, thoughts, efforts and extend a little bit of love towards one another to make our country a safest place on this earth."

Brenton Tarrant will be sentenced in a four-day hearing in the High Court at Christchurch before Justice Cameron Mander.

The Herald will provide full coverage of the sentencing.