Bullying of gays 'not on' at King's

King's College pupil, Denis McLay. Photo / Paul Estcourt

King's College says it "honours and respects" its diverse student population and views any instances of homophobic bullying as unacceptable.

Denis McLay, the 17-year-old son of former Deputy Prime Minister Jim McLay, spoke out this week about his struggle as a closet homosexual boarder at King's College.

He says he was pushed to contemplate suicide several times, and decided to go public about his struggle in the hope it would highlight how difficult it was to be gay at school.

Headmaster Bradley Fenner yesterday told the Herald homosexuality was not something that was "frowned upon" at King's and support was available for students who needed it.

"Denis himself has said how he was well supported by the chaplain and also the counsellor and I think also other staff here. We have got in place an extensive pastoral care structure."

Mr Fenner said sexuality was discussed in various parts of the curriculum, including personal development in health and in the religious education programme.

Education centred on respecting the diversity of the student body.

"It's in a very non-judgmental kind of way. It's based on supporting people and resolving issues relating to identity as well.

"Certainly there are students here who are gay, just as there are at any school. Part of our responsibility as a school is to make sure it's a supportive school environment so that those things don't become matters which can cause students pain and anguish."

Denis told the Herald a culture existed in which everyone - especially young men - callously derided homosexuals in private, not thinking that among them could be some who kept their sexuality a secret.

"It was painful to hear those comments while in the closet," he said. He recently told his friends and family about his sexuality, and says things have become easier since then. He now wants to help others.

Mr Fenner said society had changed in the last 10 to 15 years and homosexuality had become "far more acceptable".

"Could we be doing more? I think we have to just try to continually emphasise the message to students that whatever they are thinking, whatever they are going through, it's okay and to try to help ensure they are not alone."

Denis's father - who is now New Zealand's ambassador to the United Nations - said from New York that he loved and supported his son and was "very proud of the courage he has shown and of his concern for others" in speaking out.

Olympic speed skater Blake Skjellerup is urging the Prime Minister to address homophobic bullying.

The 25-year-old, who says he was bullied at school for being gay, is urging students throughout the country to send the Prime Minister letters saying homophobic and transphobic bullying in schools is out of control.

The campaign will coincide with national anti-bullying day, Pink Shirt Day, tomorrow.