Basher turns himself in after domestic violence ad

A Tauranga man turned himself in to police to break the cycle of domestic violence against his wife and three-year-old son.

Haunted by his own abusive childhood and under pressure after losing his job, Tremaine Faleauto fell into the cycle of family violence, repeatedly assaulting his wife and three-year-old son.

But it was seeing an anti-family violence advertisement on television which finally made the 27-year-old Bay of Plenty man change his ways, and turn himself into police.

Faleauto went to police with his wife and a local pastor, after deciding he needed counselling.

Faleauto admitted one charge of assault on a child, and three charges of assault with intent to injure when he appeared before Judge Christopher Harding in Tauranga District Court this week for sentence.

The charges stemmed from four assaults between May 2008 and July 2009. The first occurred when Faleauto was having dinner at home with his wife and four children.

His son's continued complaining about his dinner agitated Faleauto, who reached across the table, placed both hands around his boy's throat and neck, and applied pressure.

He lifted him off the ground before walking him around the dining table.

When his wife intervened, Faleauto forced her to the ground.

In another incident on April 20, Faleauto grabbed his wife around the throat and lifted her off the ground, causing her to struggle to breathe. He threw her to the ground, and as she lay curled up, he kicked and punched her numerous times, causing a 10cm bruise to her left shoulder.

On July 6, Faleauto punched his three-year-old son three times with a closed fist in the lower chest and upper stomach area.

The next day, when his son would not stop crying, Faleauto pulled the boy's pants down and smacked him several times.

Lawyer Nicholas Dutch argued that Faleauto's case distinguished itself from others which came before the courts, as the offences may not have come to light without Faleauto's confession.

Judge Harding sentenced Faleauto to three months' home detention, including attending rehabilitation programmes.

Judge Harding also revealed that Faleauto's childhood was fraught with physical abuse and he was under extra stress looking after the children after losing his job.

Meanwhile, police and social service agencies are dealing with an upsurge in the reporting of family violence incidents, and say the trend is a sign the "It's Not OK" and the "See Something, Say Something" campaigns are working.

Western Bay police Family Violence co-ordinator Detective Sergeant Jason Perry said that last month, officers dealt with 240 family violence incidents.

Since September 1 police were called to 64 incidents.

So far this year, Western Bay police have attended 1800 family violence-related incidents. In the whole of 2008 they dealt with 2300 incidents.

Mr Perry said as a result of Faleauto coming to police himself, police were able to connect him and his victims with support agencies.

"While it's a rare thing for an offender to put their hand up to police in this way, it's a good thing because admitting what they have done is a vital step in helping break the cycle of violence".

Jeanine Lumsden, men's service manager with Tauranga Living Without Violence Trust, said it was great one man was willing to admit what he had done and get help.

"Now the challenge is for more men to do the same. If more people did step up and get help it would create a far safer environment for our children."

She said more people were seeking advice and support for other family members.

"That's exciting, as it shows when families and the community work together, positive things can happen."

Tauranga Moana Abuse Prevention Strategy co-ordinator Sally Hetherington said Faleauto handing himself in to police was "fantastic" and the increase in self-referrals to support agencies was clear evidence that anti-violence campaigns were working.

- BAY OF PLENTY TIMES