''Most of those men were boys and were put into an institution where they were controlled by fear and they had nowhere to go to and there was huge power involved in the dynamics of that which for some of them they can't even walk past a church. If they see a priest or a nun they get triggered by what happened to them.''
A common thread coming from the evidence of survivors is that when they tried to tell someone about the abuse inflicted on them, whether it be to other staff, the police or family, more often than not they were not believed.
''Unfortunately, their parents didn't believe them and in some cases, the boys got a hiding for saying horrible things about those wonderful men that were looking after them.''
Clearwater related a story to the inquiry about a homeless man who came to him seeking help.
He had been raped as a child while at Marylands.
When Clearwater phoned the head of St John of God on the man's behalf, he got a sharp response from Brother Timothy Graham.
"'After the money is he?' Was the response I got straight away."
"The person heard it and he looked over at me and said, 'they never f...... believe me'. At that moment, in my office, he attempted to kill himself.''
Clearwater reacted very quickly.
''I picked him up and I cradled him in my arms. He was like a wee boy in my arms and he was just sobbing. I said to him, 'you will be all right mate' and he says 'no, they never believe you, they never believe you when you tell them these stories'."
Meanwhile, Brother Timothy was still on the line and heard everything.
"I remember saying some pretty harsh words to Brother Timothy on the other end. I certainly wouldn't repeat them here."
A contrite Brother Timothy then talked about getting the man some help.
Ken Clearwater describes the Catholic Church as a vicious church.
"I have been fighting for 25 years so that boys can get the services they deserve and I am hoping that that will come out of this Royal Commission and what I ask for is that the Church has to pay its price for the damage that it has done."
On Tuesday, the head of the St John of God Order in Australasia, Brother Timothy Graham, will give evidence to the Royal Commission.
Where to get help:
• Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7)
• Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)
• Youthline: 0800 376 633 or text 234 (available 24/7)
• Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7)
• Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (12pm to 11pm)
• Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 or text 4202 (available 24/7)
• Anxiety helpline: 0800 269 4389 (0800 ANXIETY) (available 24/7)
• Rainbow Youth: (09) 376 4155
If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.
- RNZ