Situated on Bradford St, in walking distance of Parnell village, the dilapidated home falls within the coveted double grammar zone, as well as shopping, top restaurants and the CBD "very near your currently crumbling doorstep".
And despite the rusty roof, worn-out deck and peeling, dirty wallpaper, the "too tired to bark" home has original features throughout, with ornate fireplaces, wood-panelled walls and ceilings, and slide-and-sash windows.
Advertised on TradeMe, the property could "offer visionary and canny purchasers an opportunity to live in, not only one of Auckland's oldest and well-heeled suburbs, but also a suburb convenient to everything the city has to offer and within the double grammar zones", the listing says.
"The term 'you look good for your age' certainly does not apply at 36 Bradford Street," the honest advertising lays clear.
"In a less than desirable state, this home certainly has a huge amount of work required to fit in with its charming neighbours."
The listing goes on to say that potential buyers could "transform" the old building, or "seek a more drastic path on advice from the Auckland Council".
"You can really let your creativity run rampant in this sublime location.
"This time traveller is weary, give it peace and rest and reap the reward offered by the stunning location."
In October, a ramshackle Grey Lynn villa at 2 Leighton St sold at auction for $1.075 million, despite its rotting floorboards and nicotine-caked walls.
The late-1800s two-bedroom settler's cottage was touted as "the worst condition house in the best suburb", and did not have electricity or running water.
It was bought by a trio of Auckland builders who said they wanted to repair and renovate the property to "save this house".
* The property at 36 Bradford St is to be sold by auction on February 22.
