Would you make your family pay to come over and have Christmas dinner? Photo / 123rf.com
The table is set, the champagne's on ice and crackers sit by the plates.
All that remains is for the guests to arrive for Christmas lunch, where they will be welcomed with open arms.
As long as they have paid up in advance, that is.
This is the reality of Christmas Day festivities at the home of Leah Wright this year.
She has invited 12 people - all family - to celebrate with her and her partner, Andrew Fuller, at their comfortable home in South London.
Yet she has made it clear that guests can only attend if they pay her £60 (NZ$107) per couple for the privilege.
And if you're coming without a plus one?
Too bad.
Leah's mother and sister are attending without partners and must still fork out £60 (NZ$107) each.
Not only that, but Leah insists on having the money in advance - cash or a bank transfer directly into the couple's account.
For providing the lunch, she has a budget of just over £400 (NZ$417).
It's a sum that will leave Leah with a profit from her guests' contributions, and cover the cost of her own and Andrew's Christmas lunch.
And her guests won't even get a glass of wine for their £60 (NZ$107) fee - they have been asked to bring a bottle with them.
"Everyone is in employment, we all receive complimentary bottles [of wine] at this time of year.
I don't see why we shouldn't all enjoy them at the family Christmas lunch," says Leah.
At this point, many people will be thinking that even Scrooge might have blanched at turning a profit from making family members pay for a home-cooked meal to which he had invited them.
Yet Leah is not alone.
She is one of a growing number of women who are requesting payment in return for entertaining family and friends on Christmas Day.
Goodwill to all men? Not quite, it seems.
But 28-year-old Leah, a primary school teacher on maternity leave, is unrepentant.
She says she simply can't see why she should have to take the financial hit for feeding so many people.
Not that she is exactly on the breadline.
She and 33-year-old Andrew, an executive chef, have a combined annual household income of £85,000 (NZ$151,767)
And it is Christmas, after all.
Perhaps not surprisingly, there has been outrage from some family members at the idea of paying for their festive lunch.
The first rumbles of discontent surfaced when Leah sent out emails and texts to everyone in their immediate family, inviting them to lunch and also revealing how much they would have to pay for the privilege.
Her in-laws were particularly upset, Leah admits.
In contrast, her side of the family accepted the idea - because for the past four years they have also requested payment up front for the Christmas Day meal, a practice instigated by Leah's mother.
Leah insists this is the first year there has been any muttering about money changing hands.
"It has certainly caused issues with some family members.
"I heard several negative comments on the family grapevine and was a bit taken aback at first.
"My two sisters and I don't have a problem with paying.
"After all, it was a lot for Mum to have to cover on her own.
'But this is the first year the two families have come together.
"My partner's side aren't used to how we do things, so that's probably why they were shocked."
It was left to Andrew to explain to his horrified relatives that Christmas would be a payment-only affair.
"What undoubtedly caused the family flare-up this year was the way we went about it - inviting everyone but telling them at the same time what we're charging them," says Leah.
"Perhaps receiving an email or a text isn't in keeping with the festive season, but it's better to be clear about it."
Does she regret the whole arrangement? "Definitely not.
My thinking is that just because we host the meal, that doesn't mean we should cover the entire cost.
It was only when we'd received some of the payments that we ordered the food."
In an attempt to calm down everyone after her invitation, Leah, who has two sons, Jaylen, seven, and six-month-old Logan, then sent out her proposed menu, so guests could see what they would get in return.
She insists that for £60 (NZ$107) they will be treated to a "restaurant experience".
"Andrew is a chef and what we're offering isn't a traditional Christmas roast. He will prepare an exquisite three-course meal.
"There are a variety of smoked salmon starters.
"The main course includes turkey, duck and pork, with a selection of five vegetables.
"This is followed by a choice of three desserts. If anything, we're spoiling them!"
The planning for Leah and Andrew's big Christmas lunch began in November.
And while Leah, who has experience of catering and organising events, has no intention of cooking the now controversial meal herself, she did design the menu.
"I'm the bossy-boots," she says. "I knew exactly what I wanted. The only change I've had to make is including quiches as an option for starters, because my sisters aren't keen on fish.
"Our guests will arrive at 1pm, to sit down at 4pm. I enjoy being a hostess. I know how to make sure everyone has fun.
"Despite everything, I don't have any dread about how things will go on the day.
"While our families are different and don't share the same outlook on life, I'll be keeping everyone's glasses topped up while Andrew works in the kitchen.
"We're getting good deals on the meat and vegetables. Andrew is using his preferred suppliers. My family understand. It isn't personal, it's a transaction, which means we'll all enjoy it so much more."
As for her in-laws' misgivings, Leah is upbeat: "Everyone is fine about it now. I'm determined there won't be an atmosphere on Christmas Day."
But Peter Sidwell, curator of the recipe website Simple Good Food, doesn't share Leah's confidence.
"Used notes changing hands between family members just feels so wrong," he says. "If someone genuinely can't afford to host Christmas lunch, they shouldn't make the offer. Or they could ask their loved ones to bring a dish, not make a bank transfer."
Indeed, despite Leah's protestations of expense, research confirms that hosting Christmas Day need not be financially crippling.
Good Housekeeping magazine showed how to feed eight people a traditional Christmas lunch for less than £20 (NZ$35.70) - £2.48 (NZ$4.40) a head - by shopping around for bargains. Whether you keep a keen eye on the cost of Christmas or not, though, would you have the gall to ask your family to stump up if you found yourself short of cash to pay for Christmas lunch - and even the decorations?
That is precisely what Julie Baker, a children's physiotherapist, asked of her family.
Until two years ago, 32-year-old Julie and husband Jonathan, 35, a project manager, were happy to cover the £100 (NZ$178) cost of the meal, which Julie has always insisted on hosting at her home in Kings Langley, Hertfordshire, because she hates the thought of driving on Christmas Day.
But then Jonathan was made redundant. So Julie, who has a two-year-old son, Dylan, asked her family to pay up for the privilege of eating at her home.
"Money was tight so everyone agreed to chip in," she says.
Even though Jonathan is back in work and the family finances are healthier, she continues to ask her guests for cash to pay for the Christmas meal.
"It's a tradition I've continued, especially as the meal has got bigger, with more family members joining us," she says.
"Luckily our dining room is large enough to accommodate eight people. But it's exhausting having to clean the house and prepare everything in the run-up to the meal.
"That's why I have no qualms about asking everyone for cash up front to pay the local suppliers I prefer to use at this time of year. I do soften it by saying what they're contributing towards, though."
This year Julie has received money for everything from the turkey to the decorations. Her father-in-law handed over £40 (NZ$71.42) to pay for the turkey. Her generous mother gave her £50 (NZ$89.28) for decorations and food, while her mother-in-law has shelled out £30 (NZ$53.57) towards the food.
All in all, Julie estimates that the budget for tomorrow's meal will be £150 (NZ$267) including the food, soft drinks and alcohol - and, like Leah, she is adamant that requesting financial help is acceptable.
"I don't feel guilty about it. I work, I'm a mum. I'll be stressed out over the next few days. Even though I enjoy the cooking part, I did look into us all going to the local gastro pub - but at £60 (NZ$107) a head for a meal they'd normally charge £25 (NZ$44) for, it was ridiculous. My family has got a good deal with me.
"This way I won't be stressing about paying the bills at the end of January, either. The only thing I'm worrying about is whether my signature dessert, pavlova, will be up to scratch."
But while Leah and Julie say their meals are worth the price because of the work that goes into them, spare a thought for the guests of Cherry Bennett, 29.
She charges £60 (NZ$107) per couple for Christmas dinner - without a starter.
"I did get a lot of stick for charging so much. The running joke was that I'd been to Harrods to buy everything," she says.
"I got a lot of ribbing for my extravagant budget. Yet no one complained when they had a glass of prosecco in their hand."
At least her request for money in 2014 caused little family tension as it has become a tradition. Cherry, her mother and other family members take it in turn to host 13 guests and always ask for payment up front.
"Normally the family running the Christmas lunch charges £50 (Nz$89.28) a couple. But for my year, I couldn't make the budget work on that - so I told everyone they had to pay £60 (NZ$107) per couple instead," says Cherry, a full-time mum to daughter Lexi, nine, and son Huxton, two.
"My philosophy is that everyone has to pay up front. No questions asked. With 13 of us to cater for, it's not fair to expect one couple to foot such an enormous bill."
So Cherry, who lives in Eastbourne, East Sussex, with husband Adam, 32, a business partner in procurement at the local council, made sure everyone had paid before she did her food shop.
"One paid by bank transfer, the other handed over the cash. Mum and Dad paid me in notes, too."
With cash in hand, Cherry - who calls herself a big Christmas spender - then set off to the shops, determined everything would be perfect.
In the event, there were a few testing moments.
"I did get stressed out with my husband," she says. "We'd missed our local carol service the night before so I could make a start on the vegetables. I was up at 6am to get the turkey under way.
"When everyone arrived at 11.30am, I trusted Adam to serve the drinks. But he was so slow! I did get cross with him."
Luckily the meal was perfect.
"I'm very traditional," says Cherry. "There was no sprouts-wrapped-in-bacon malarkey. I'm known for my crispy roast potatoes and my turkey was cooked to perfection - you get what you pay for.
"The only thing that let me down was my soggy broccoli. But I was on my feet until 8.30pm, when everyone left. It was exhausting.
"This year, though, my parents have moved away. It's the first time I'll be doing Christmas dinner on my own - and it will definitely be less stressful."
Despite the kerfuffle asking her in-laws for payment has caused, Leah Wright believes that, in fact, more of us should charge for hosting Christmas Day.
"Just send out the invitations, menus and prices in advance," she says. "Make it clear so everyone knows what they're getting for their contribution.
"It really is the only way."
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