Grace Tame with Prime Minister Scott Morrison. Photo / Supplied
In 2019, when the man who led the royal commission into the banking sector refused to smile during a photo opportunity with Josh Frydenberg, it didn't make waves.
Footage of former High Court judge Kenneth Hayne refusing to shake the Treasurer's hand as he prepared to release a damning report was described as "brutal" and "awkward" in a handful of media reports – but that was about the extent of it.
It didn't spark a frenzied national debate, and male journalists and conservative MPs didn't describe Hayne's behaviour "ungracious and rude" or "childish and embarrassing".
Yesterday though, when 2021 Australian of the Year Grace Tame chose not to put on a show when greeting Prime Minister Scott Morrison, the reaction was vastly different.
Journalist Julia Baird was quick to point out the double standard on Twitter.
"A quiet reminder that when Justice Kenneth Hayne, head of royal commission into banking misconduct, refused to smile or even shake the hand of the Treasurer during a photo op in 2019, it was not considered the stuff of national calamity," the host of ABC's The Drum wrote.
"Grace Tame is making a similar point."
Sharing Baird's post, The Project's Lisa Wilkinson agreed.
"Nor was there uproar when Scott Morrison turned his back on Tanya Plibersek and played with his phone as she addressed him in Fed parliament," Wilkinson added.
"Nor when he refused to shake Bill Shorten's hand at Bob Hawke's funeral.
"Not sure why the rules are different. Oh wait ..."
Wheelchair racer and Paralympian Kurt Fearnley hit the nail on the head when, sharing a photo of an unsmiling Pope Francis alongside former US President Donald Trump in 2017, he wrote: "Not one bloke, from me to the Pope would've been told to 'smile more'. #justsayin"
Very telling in who is criticising Grace Tame for reacting with her authentic feelings. We’re all very conditioned to seeing women smile, even when we know it’s fake, to keep the peace. It’s refreshing to see a woman not do the polite thing to make others feel better
Tame is a survivor of child sexual abuse and grooming who found the strength to report and jail the vile man who repeatedly assaulted her, and then fought to be able to legally tell her story and overturn a draconian law that prevented her from speaking her own name in the media.
She utilised her tenure as Australian of the Year extraordinarily, thrusting the confronting topic of child sexual assault into the national spotlight and into conversations around dinner tables, workplaces and political spheres.
But all of that went out the window in the minds of some yesterday, all because she, like Justice Hayne three years ago, refused to "smile" in a photo.
As The Project's Carrie Bickmore asked her co-host Peter Van Onsolen on last night's show, off the back of his own column criticising Tame for "acting like a child": "Why do you feel the need to tell Grace how she should have behaved? But second of all, why should she stand there and smile and pretend it's all okay when there is an absolute catastrophe on the cards here?"
"I don't think she should stand there and smile and pretend it's all OK, I just thought she shouldn't go. If you can't be polite in some form, then don't go," he replied.
"But why should she have to be silenced and quiet? Why can't she go and make a statement in her behaviour about how she feels over what has happened in the past year?" shot back Bickmore.
Nina Funnell, the journalist behind the #LetHerSpeak campaign that allowed Tame to tell her story, asked on Twitter what, exactly, "did they think would happen when they organised this photo op?"
"Grace Tame is not the type to lie about how she feels. And nor should we ever put her in a position where she is expected to."