While the study is new, the concept isn’t. An example in popular culture, cited by several reports, is the dynamic featured in the 2024 film Challengers; a premise that centres on a love triangle between an injured tennis star-turned-coach, her tennis player ex-boyfriend and her tennis champion husband across 13 years of a shared relationship, with the sexual tension driving the film’s story and much of its fandom.
Real-world examples were the subject of the new study. Published in the sexology journal Archives of Sexual Behaviour, the research determined symbiosexuality is experienced by a range of populations, spanning age demographics, racial backgrounds, socio-economic classes and gender identities.
“A recent review of cultural and academic discourse presented evidence that some people experience attraction to two (or more) people in a pre-existing relationship,” Johnston stated in the report.
“This phenomenon, symbiosexuality, is understudied in the field of sexuality. Lack of recognition and validation for this attraction, including in the polyamorous community, may be negatively impacting those who experience symbiosexual attraction.”
What is symbiosexuality?
As part of her research, Johnston conducted an integrated mixed-methods analysis of secondary data from the 2023 Pleasure Study to learn more about symbiosexual attraction. Findings from the study supported the idea a diverse range of people experience symbiosexual attraction, she said.
“[It can be described] as an attraction to the energy, multi-dimensionality and power shared between people in relationships,” she stated.
“Further, findings from this study indicate that a diverse group of people experience symbiosexual attraction and, while unanticipated, symbiosexual attraction can be a strong, frequent and/or pervasive experience.”
One participant in the study described symbiosexuality as a “desire toward something greater than the sum of a couple’s parts”, adding: “The combination of them is just - it’s a transcendent thing. It’s beautiful and they have one of the most beautiful relationships that I know ... it is definitely very much not just about the sum of the parts, but something that is greater than that. There’s something synergistic.”
Earlier research from 2021 previously defined the phenomenon as “the individual experience of sexual and/or romantic attraction to people in relationships”.
Johnston noted the attraction to the “relationship and/or energy shared between people” is what differentiates symbiosexuality from the likes of bisexuality or pansexuality, which are defined as attractions to more than one gender or attractions to all genders.
Importantly, the nature of symbiosexuality doesn’t mean a symbiosexual person is inherently interested in or has a preference for relationships that involve three of more people, Johnston explained.
Another interviewee who participated in the study told Johnston: “I just want to be smack in the middle of that relationship. I would also like to be included in this relationship… I really think my ideal dynamic might be myself and a couple.”
However, a third participant questioned whether his desire to immerse himself in an established relationship was healthy, telling Johnston: “I think to some degree, as a single man, there’s a certain attractiveness to a relationship, to people in a relationship. Whether or not that’s psychologically healthy, I think we can debate a little bit... I definitely am attracted to that partnering, to that coupling, to even that love between two people. And perhaps on some level, wanting to participate in that in some way, shape or form.”
A largely uninvestigated sexuality
Despite there being evidence of symbiosexuality in essays, memoirs, ancient Middle Eastern texts and indigenous narratives, the attraction to relationships between people remains largely uninvestigated, Johnston said. She hopes her new research will not only challenge the “ongoing invisibility” of the attraction but help push the boundaries of the concepts of desire and sexual orientation, particularly in sexuality studies.
Symbiosexuals may find their sexuality not only has personal implications, but implications for those close to them - including partners, family members, community members, therapists and clinicians, the study added.
Johnston’s research also indicates most self-identified symbiosexuals consider themselves to be extroverted, tolerant, trusting and desiring of intimacy, care and attention.
As symbiosexualiy remains largely unknown and misunderstood, symbiosexual people can often face invalidation, stigmatisation and discrimination from both monogamous and non-monogamous communities, according to the study. In literature, the attraction to couples’ energies and dynamics has often been described as “unicorn”, a term that carries negative connotations in non-monogamous circles. It typically refers to people who are willing to engage in sexual activity with a couple, without participating in other aspects of the relationship. As a result, stigmatisation is particularly prevalent within the polyamory community, Johnston noted - a stigma that needs to be “examined and challenged”.
“Recognition and validation of symbiosexuality will offer support for this sexual minority.”
Do you identify as symbiosexual, or have you experienced it? Contact newsdesk@nzherald.co.nz.
