Til Death Us Do Part

By REBECCA BARRY

What does a ditzy, B-grade pop star, who remained a virgin until marriage, have in common with a Playboy centrefold who's as famous for the men she's slept with as she is for her, um, talent?

Her own MTV reality show, of course.

Jessica Simpson's music career soared thanks to Newlyweds, the wholesome, fly-on-the-wall ratings hit co-starring her clean-cut popstar husband Nick Lachey. In the space of a few episodes, Simpson dispelled her perfect, vanilla-coated image with her frequent burps and stupid but endearing comments.

Now it's Carmen Electra's turn.

Carmen & Dave: Til Death Do Us Part follows the Baywatch babe/cameo queen/ex-Mrs Dennis Rodman and her rock star fiance, Dave Navarro — Jane's Addiction guitarist/one-time member of Red Hot Chili Peppers/fan of eye-liner — as they prepare for their wedding.

"All we really wanted was something simple with just a few friends and family," says the bride-to-be in the first episode, somehow managing to suppress sarcasm. "When did it become such a circus?"

About the time your future hubby decided a morgue was a romantic place for a photoshoot, perhaps?

The wedding invitation pictures the happy couple feigning death, lying naked on a slab, holding hands. Add to that Electra's porn-star-lookalike bridesmaids, a combined stag-hens do with snakes and midget strippers and you have the premise for a rock'n'roll fairytale. Even it can feel like The Osbournes, the younger, photogenic years.

It's fairly self-explanatory why Electra — an associate of the Paris Hilton hall of fame — would agree to do such a show. But isn't Navarro too cool for reality TV?

Apparently not. His band have just released an album after all, 13 years since their heyday. And there's a rather large — and telling — self-portrait in their living room.

Navarro is a Ben Stiller impression just waiting to happen. For a tough, tattooed rock guy, he seems disturbingly interested in wedding flowers and whether his Gucci bag matches his outfit. When he leaves to go on tour for two months, he is miffed Electra is not "sad" enough. Says Navarro: "I would have married you even if I didn't like you because you're just so hot."

Electra says she went through depression before meeting her soulmate.

"I would go to sleep at night, and I would just grab a book," she says, dramatically. "Y'know, a self-help book." She knew she wanted to marry him because "after we had sex I still wanted to hang out".

Funny how entertaining ego and shallow dialogue can be.

But even if they can't act naturally around the cameras, they genuinely appear to be in love.

Watch as they mock-argue about when they first made the beast with two backs.

Sigh as Electra divulges that if she hadn't gone on that blind date three years ago, she would have turned to lesbianism.

Feel inspired when Navarro imparts that the secret to a good marriage — and he should know, he's been married before — is honesty and self-centredness.

At least they'll never run out of things to talk about.