I would love people to think I'm cool but I'm fundamentally not. And that's something I've come to accept. I'm nearly 30 and it's f***ing tough but I've had to accept that, "Oh I'm a nerd." That will never change and I have to accept that. I may not like it but I have to accept it.
I'm in Northeast London, Hackney, basically. It's bougie but it doesn't want anyone to know it. It's so close to Dalston and Dalston's very cool, very East London, like artsy young vibes. Very young yo-pro vibes in Hackney. It's hard to say what the equivalents are, but it's your Ponsonbys, veering towards K Roads. It's got a mixture of like mums and stuff, posh parents. Oh, so many couples! Like if I walk down the high street, it's just couple after couple, holding hands, on very narrow sidewalks, and I'm just this angry woman being like, 'Don 't block the sidewalks! There's a global pandemic! Wear a mask! Also, don't go out! Like, why? Why go out? If you've got someone you love, stay at home. I don't want to see it. For f***'s sake.
Even if I was in a couple, I would not hold hands while walking down the street on a narrow sidewalk. Also, I'd be embarrassed. If you were holding hands and you were a couple and you saw all these other couples holding hands, wouldn't you feel so disgusting? Like it was Pleasantville, like The Truman Show. Like ew! Like, get a life. Like, separate, end it, do something! I don't know. And none of them seem really happy, do you know what I mean? None of them are truly happy. I think the happiest couples are the ones who are laughing together but not holding hands. There's probably affection behind it, sure. But not on my watch.
I love London. I never expected to ever have moved to London. It almost happened, not accidentally, but it was never in my goals. But it happened. I really do like it here. I've built somewhat of a life here and so much of my work is here and I'm kind of psycho for work. I love working and I love making stuff and this is the place I can make stuff at the moment.
As told to Greg Bruce.
Rose Matafeo's new show Starstruck screens on TVNZ 2 on April 28 at 9.30pm. All episodes will also be available on TVNZ OnDemand.