When reflecting on our own upbringings, which parenting methods stand the test of time and which are best left in the past? Photo / NZ Herald
OPINION:
Join hosts Jordan Watson, aka How to Dad, and ZM’s Clint Roberts every week for The Parenting Hangover podcast, where the two dads talk about everything involved in raising their respective families in a modern, changing world. From tackling the big topics like the birds and the bees to talking about intimacy after kids with a qualified sexologist — these 21st-century Kiwi dads aren’t afraid to go there.
OPINION:
Are “old-school” parenting techniques really out of date? Are new parenting techniques better?
It’s a question many parents who grew up in the 80s and 90s may ask themselves,The Parenting Hangoverhosts Clint Roberts and Jordan Watson aren’t exempt.
Parents of today’s little ones all have vivid memories of how they were raised by their parents. Part of the process for new parents is figuring out how to look after your own kids and reflecting on what worked best (and what could’ve worked better).
With this in mind, Roberts and Watson reflect on their childhoods in the 90s. They look back on the evolution of parenting norms and how techniques that were once so normal now seem strange and outdated.
Conversely, they also discuss the techniques lost over time that should be brought back.
One of those that rightly remains in the past is the “wooden spoon treatment”, with the pair confessing that parents in 2024 wouldn’t even consider this type of discipline for their children.
New Zealand’s anti-smacking bill of 2007 banished that type of physical punishment and Watson and Roberts believe that’s a good thing, with Watson lamenting the day when wooden spoons were more than just a kitchen utensil.
But in contrast to today’s hyper-vigilant parenting styles, the 90s upbringings saw kids riding bikes across town on hours-long, unchartered adventures.
Today it seems like something from a Steven Spielberg movie, but in the 90s it was just another afternoon for a young person. So what has changed?
Roberts recalls his own adventures biking across Rotorua, riding “kilometres away” on a “pretty cool mountain bike that I bought with my paper-run money”.
Now, “the idea of my daughters riding any further than like a couple of blocks away from my house” terrifies him.
“I don’t know any kids that are riding suburbs away - I don’t reckon kids do that anymore.”
“We hear more bad stories and you find out more information. The more information you have, the better decisions you can make and the more cotton wool you wrap on your kid,” he said.
Whether a family trip overseas has become a norm, however, remains a bit ambiguous.
In the 90s, only the luckiest took an overseas trip with their family. Holidays were to the campground, not the Gold Coast, and kids just didn’t go on planes.
“I remember hearing the conversations my parents had about re-mortgaging the house to be able to pay for this.
“And it was the best holiday ever, we created the most amazing memories. But that was it as a family - that was one trip overseas.”
To hear more about Watson and Roberts comparing and contrasting old-school parenting techniques with modern-day approaches, listen to this week’s episode of The Parenting Hangover below.
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