The key to getting a second date

The key to getting a second date with someone you fancy is to be really nosy, say psychologists. Photo / 123RF

Forget trying to be funny, splashing out on a new outfit or bragging about your sports car.

The key to getting a second date with someone you fancy is to be really nosy, say psychologists.

A study found that the quickest and most effective way to convince someone to see you again is to ask them lots of questions about themselves, reports Daily Mail.

Showing genuine interest in a potential partner's life makes them warm to you rapidly and boosts the chances of a second meeting.

Researchers from Harvard University said many singletons fear being too intrusive on a first date.

Instead, many make the mistake of bragging about personal wealth or possessions in a bid to impress strangers.

But being nosy sends out the message you genuinely care about the other person's wellbeing - a trait more likely to win them over.

The researchers studied interactions during three speed dating sessions, which saw men and women given just four minutes to get to know each other.

Participants then told organisers which of their "dates" they would like to see again.
The psychologists recorded conversations between 110 men and women before going through each encounter to analyse how many questions were asked.

They also noted follow-up questions that indicated daters were delving deeper into each other's lives and interests.

Results were then matched with how many agreed to a second date. Men were found to want a second date with more than half the women they met, while women only wanted to see just over a third of the men.

On average, each dater asked ten questions. But researchers said those asking 15 questions boosted their chances of a second date with at least one person.

Writing in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, they said: "Speed daters who ask more follow-up questions ... are more likely to elicit agreement for second dates.

"Despite the persistent and beneficial effects of asking questions, people do not anticipate that it increases interpersonal liking.

"They may be unsure about what to ask, or worry about being perceived as rude."