The Dating Diaries: Rating three sugar daddies in my DMs

Entertainment Writer·NZ Herald·

5 Aug, 2021 09:00 PM4 mins to read

Hugh Hefner and Holly Madison. Photo / Getty Images

As a melodramatic Gen Zer, it's a part of my identity to complain about how much I earn compared to how much I spend. Quite simply, they don't match up.

Perhaps it stems from the "I'm better than everyone" attitude I acquired with my university degree. I was told an overpriced piece of paper proving you sat in a classroom for x amount of years would result in a boss job with great income.

Well, I'm 24 and I'm pretty sure the only thing my degree proves is that I learned how long it takes to burn a couch and New Zealand's binge-drinking epicentre is somewhere between Hyde and Castle St.

And if I think about it for too long, I'll start crying because the $170 a fortnight I pay to my student loan seems a bit excessive when it doesn't feel like it's putting me any further ahead in life. I mean come on, think of all the things I could be using that money for.

Alas, I may have an answer to my incoming vs outgoing problem.

If you know me personally, you'll know I love attention from the male species, in fact, my guy friend once called me a narcissist because I eye-flirted with every single lad on the d-floor and ignored them if they came to talk to me (I was having a true main character moment, okay).

I love male attention. It's why I love having male friends and most of the time why I love having males in my DMs, so you can imagine how stoked I was when I changed my Instagram account to public and decided to look at my message requests.

I found not one but three messages from sugar daddies and for a bit of entertainment decided to rate them for you.

I'm not going to lie, with three potential sugar daddies I was starting to feel a bit like a Playboy Bunny. Move over Holly Madison.

Sugar Daddy #1 is polite, he calls me dear (which is kind of weird because that's what my dad calls me), there seems to be little to no admin involved in securing the $5000 he's offering, got to love that. He wants to pay for my whole life in exchange for companionship, which sounds like easy money. It's a 5/10 for me.

Sugar Daddy #2 is freaking me out a little. As someone who grew up on social media it's well-known capital letters are aggressive and a form of yelling and I'm simply not okay with being yelled at by a man even for $5000. 3/10 for this daddy.

Sugar Daddy #3 has a friendly touch. The emojis prove he's on the younger side of the boomer scale, he isn't down for the explicit content which I appreciate because we all know what happened when Miley's nudes got leaked (she got judged ferociously) and to top it all off he's letting me send a WISH LIST! I feel like a child sending Santa a letter. It's an 8/10 for me.

While the world of sugar daddies is intriguing, (who wouldn't want lush holidays, designer goods, and fancy dinners?) I'm not so naive to think these messages are legit. One Google search of "Instagram sugar daddy" will give you hundreds of results of people who have messaged these IG daddies back to find they are scammers trying to get $5000 instead of giving it.

But the sugar daddy/baby world does exist and through interviews, TikToks, Instagram posts, it can look like a very desirable lifestyle especially if you connect with a SD who is on the younger side but if you are seriously considering becoming a sugar baby do your research first.

And be sure to listen to the Trainee Sexologist episode where they interviewed a woman who has been there, done that and said there is no money in being a New Zealand sugar baby. You'll earn a lot better coin as an adult dancer and you'll get some hardcore abs doing it.

Whatever your future plans, always remember, work smarter, not harder.