Shaolin Soccer

Reviewed by EWAN McDONALD

(Herald rating * * * *)

Bend it like Beckham, no. Shake, rattle, roll, fly, zap, fry the ball, blast the back out of the net like ... like, well, chop-soccer rather than chop-socky. This is sporting flick meets Hong Kong action comedy meets videogame — the top- grossing action comedy in the island's history. It was a hit at the 2002 Toronto Film Festival, timed to coincide with the World Cup Finals in Japan-Korea, but Miramax bought the US rights and delayed its worldwide release.

Stephen Chow co-wrote, directed and stars as Sing, a martial arts master who has to earn a crust as a street cleaner.

He is in love with Mui (Vicki Zhao), the plain woman who sells buns from a stall in the street and has self-esteem issues about her complexion, so covers her face with her hair (this is not a gratuitous aside: it is an integral part of the plot, lest e.g. be mistaken for one of those low-rent news-stand magazines).

Sing's offsider, to throw in a soccerish term, is Fung (Ng Man Tat), who also had a previous life, as a football star known as the Golden Leg. Fung's career ended when his leg was broken by Hung (Patrick Tse Yin). He now stumbles around the streets while Hung is the rich, powerful owner of Team Evil.

Because this is part-sporting flick, we know that Sing will recruit seven monks from his former monastery to form the Shaolin side to meet and beat Team Evil in the big climax. Because it is a Hong Kong action comedy, we know that it will involve lots of Crouching Striker Hidden Goalie-type dramatics, with players swooping and diving acrobatically through the air, belting the ball so hard it catches fire on the way to the net, or drilling a groove in the ground like a football-pitch torpedo targeted at goal. There's also a full-on musical spot — and, of course, Mui will become a raving beauty before the end (for those who were worried about the earlier gratuitous comment).

The DVD offers little apart from two cuts of the film — the 87-minute US version and the 112-minute original, which contains three extra scenes.

DVD, video rental Out now