Can a serious slump in libido for women in menopause be reversed?
Menopause doesn’t have to mean the kiss of death for a woman’s sex life, says Kiwi scientist Dr Iona Weir, who talks to Joanna Wane about putting her own product to the test.
It’s official: menopause tanks the libido. In a new survey of 500 Kiwi women aged 50-plus, 39% hadn’t had sex in more than a year.
Some who aren’t officially in a dry patch are struggling, too. Almost half say they’re finding it more difficult to become aroused and to have an orgasm.
For many, that loss of desire is having a damaging effect on their mental health, with 18% experiencing psychological distress or despair and ongoing impacts on their intimate relationships and self-confidence.
“Sadly,” one woman said, “sexual pleasure is non-existent.”
The View from Down Under report is independent research commissioned by Weir_Science, a research and development company founded by Auckland cell biologist Dr Iona Weir.
Taking a “hands-on” approach to the problem, she’s spent the past five years developing a new patented product that’s being released in pharmacies for World Menopause Day.
An innovative non-hormonal formulation made in New Zealand, Weir’s Myregyna Hydrating Cream is designed to support postmenopausal genital health at a cellular level.
A recent Viva piece explored the new wave of “intimate care” products sweeping the beauty industry, with the global sexual wellness market predicted to reach a market value of US$58.6 billion ($92 billion) by 2032.
Weir is working through the process to have her cream registered by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in the US as a pharmaceutical product and it’s currently the subject of a double-blind clinical trial. Information on the Myregyna website says women using it should see “noticeable change” within two to four weeks.
The focus of the topical cream was to provide support for vaginal dryness and discomfort, but the plumping of genital tissue also led to heightened sensations. So much so, in fact, that during the early testing process, Weir and a small group of women – including her gynaecologist – had a competition to see who could have the longest and most intense orgasm.
The record was three minutes and 27 seconds – from the moment when the woman pressed the start button on her timer to the sensations finally ebbing away.
“We’d have our phones ready so that you could just tap and go. Then we’d message each other and say, ‘”I think they just heard me on the Viaduct and I live in the Waitākeres!’” says Weir, who’s refreshingly direct and open about the impact of menopause on how women experience sexual pleasure.
“What we were finding is that the nerves and skin were more sensitive and getting more aroused again. We were restoring that nerve touch, which is then actually restoring your desire.”
Actor Robyn Malcolm, who’s come on board as a brand ambassador, has been putting the cream to the test for the past three and a half months. She hasn’t reached the three-minute mark yet but describes the orgasms she’s been having as more of a “rolling maul” than a single intense peak.
The other bonus for Malcolm is that she’d regularly been waking up three or four times in the night to go to the loo. Now that frequent need to urinate – a common experience in postmenopause – has also resolved.
Once a subject that was strictly taboo, menopause has become a “hot” topic of conversation, from a global surge in scientific research to the emergence of an advocacy movement dedicated to raising awareness in the workplace.
For women going through hormonal fluctuations, some of the challenges they face still fly under the radar, though.
The View from Down Under survey explores an aspect of menopause that most New Zealand women have never heard of and is widely undiagnosed – despite evidence that at least half will experience symptoms.
Caused by a loss of oestrogen, Genitourinary Syndrome of Menopause (GSM) can result in vaginal dryness and discomfort, pain during sex, decreased libido, recurrent UTIs and loss of bladder control.
As well as skin thinning, sagging and a decrease in blood flow, age-related changes to the genitals can result in a loss of sensation and pleasure.
Men don’t get off scot-free, either, losing about 2.5cm (an inch) in length during erections as they age. “The reason they need Viagra is that things start to wilt a bit, right?” says Weir.
“What really frustrated the hell out of me is when I went looking through all the medical and scientific literature, there were about 6000 papers on what’s happening to men’s penises, but you can’t find a single one on women.”
Weir did her PhD at Auckland University’s cancer research labs, winning an international award for her discovery that the fundamental process of apoptosis (cell death) in plants could be reversed, later applying this to human cancer and immune cells.
Later work in immune modulation, eczema and gut health eventually led to her developing the science-based Atopis skincare range, initially setting up a home lab in her daughters’ playhouse.
“It took about 18 months,” says Weir, whose company has a policy of no animal testing. “I did blow a hole in the roof, so I got it slightly wrong there.”
When she was unexpectedly plunged into premature menopause in her early 40s, her gynaecologist – a fan of the Atopis range – warned Weir that her already dry skin was likely to become very thin and cracked.
“I’m lying there having a pap smear and she said, ‘Have you thought of using your [face] cream down there?’”
Five years on, Weir’s Myregyna cream and dietary supplement capsules are being stocked in more than 600 pharmacies and are safe to use with HRT. A consumer survey of women with GSM symptoms who have been using the cream showed a significant improvement in bladder control, vaginal/vulva dryness and overall quality of life.
Malcolm, who’s just been named as a finalist for best Actress in the New Zealand Television Awards for the drama series After the Party, says a lot of negative language is used around menopause and that needs to change.
“We’ve started to make so much noise about menopause, but I think women still feel some shame around their sexual life so we just shut it down and sit quietly in the shadows.
“What’s so positive is bringing out that conversation and saying menopause isn’t the kiss of death. Maybe it’s just about needing different sex or approaching things differently.”
We asked 10 New Zealand women for a key piece of advice on dealing with menopause and what it would have most helped them to know.
Actor Robyn Malcolm
Malcolm suffered “massive” depression and anxiety heading into menopause, and says she felt more conscious of the physical and psychological impact it was having on her than when she went through puberty.
“I wish I’d known it was gonna be a bigger deal than anyone had ever told me. The symptoms are so far-reaching – emotional, psychological, physical, hormonal. You’re full of rage and hate and sadness and fear and immediately you feel like you shouldn’t be feeling those things.
“But the reason for that is there’s this monumental thing happening and it’s meant to happen. There’s nothing wrong. And you can get out the other side and actually kind of like yourself for it. I feel more grown up now than I did pre-menopause, which is not that I feel old. I just feel more like my feet are on the earth a bit more.”
Author and health writer Nicky Pellegrino
There are 32 menopause symptoms and Pellegrino wrote about all of them in her 2022 book Don’t Sweat It: How to Make ‘the Change’ a Good One. Last month, she published her most recent novel, Marry Me in Italy.
“The one thing I wish people had told me personally is that dramatic heart palpitations can accompany a hot flush. When this happened to me I panicked, which probably made the problem worse.
“A cardiologist [male, old] told me it couldn’t be a menopause symptom. But when I was researching Don’t Sweat It, lots of women had experienced the exact same thing. Also I had tests. My heart was fine.”
Dr Ayesha Verrall, Labour’s health spokeswoman
Verrall, who worked as an infectious diseases physician before becoming an MP and the Labour Government’s Minister of Health, has been talking to New Zealand women about how their needs could better be met during menopause. The feedback she’s had is that talking openly about how it impacts health and wellbeing has been helpful, but a lot more needs to be done.
“Many are confused about what perimenopause and menopause are, how to talk about the range of symptoms they may be experiencing with their GP, and what support they can get. Women tell me they want confidence their symptoms won’t be dismissed when they raise them with a health professional or their employer.“
Film reviewer Kate Rodger
Rodger was in “full flight” menopause and suffering multiple hot flushes while covering the 2020 Academy Awards in Los Angeles before she went on HRT.
“The one thing I wish people had told me about menopause is that I had the power to take control of the rollercoaster, to demand answers, to seek support and to embrace the treatment that was right for me.
“It feels so empowering and nourishing to listen to and contribute to the loud and proud conversation around perimenopause and menopause – I love the sense of sisterhood that comes from it.”
Sarah Connor, founder of Menopause over Martinis
The Menopause over Martinis movement began when Connor hosted a potluck dinner to break down the taboos around talking about menopause, after her own horrendous experience with symptoms that ranged from severe abdominal pain to frightening anxiety attacks. She now runs sessions with businesses and government organisations to advocate for more open and supportive workplaces.
“I wish I’d known what it was! A normal series of hormonal changes with the power to affect my health and wellbeing in significant and multiple ways.
“I wish I’d known that my periods wouldn’t stop overnight, that there are many ways I could support myself, and that life after menopause is something to look forward to; another season of life.”
Author and copywriter Maria Hoyle
Now enjoying life on the other side of menopause, Hoyle has two daughters in their 20s and has just published her first book, A Very French Affair, a memoir about uprooting her life for love. She expected menopause would be clearly signposted, but it crept up earlier than she expected and lingered far longer than she had anticipated.
“What I’d tell my daughters, though, is mine really wasn’t that bad so maybe yours won’t be, either. But if you do start to feel moody, paranoid, insecure, can’t sleep and sense that you are housing your own private global warming crisis, then talk to a professional, speak to other women, read, educate yourself – and know that you really don’t have to put up with that nonsense.”
Breakfast presenter Jenny-May Clarkson
A former Silver Fern, Clarkson experienced erratic mood swings when she went into perimenopause in her late 40s.
“I wish someone had told me it’ll get ugly but you’ll be okay! I wish I’d had a conversation about the symptoms and how to manage them earlier. It was a pretty rough 18 or so months until I understood what changes my body was going through, to finally finding balance through HRT, nutrition [protein!], and exercise.”
Playwright Kathryn Burnett
In her “second coming-of-age comedy”, Nicola Cheeseman is Back, Burnett put the perspective of a menopausal woman in her early 50s on centre stage. She’s now continuing that story with regular instalments in “The Nicola Cheeseman Diaries” on Substack.
“I knew to expect hot flushes but I wish people had warned me about the changes to your hair, hair loss and that crazy-making brain fog.”
Actor Teuila Blakely
In the NZ Herald’s video series, Blood, Sweat and Tears, Blakely shared her personal experience of menopause, including the impact on her libido – and why she’s okay with that.
“My sex drive all but disappeared. That doesn’t mean it’s lost and gone forever, but it’s different now. You just feel sort of chill and that can be a good thing.
“Something I was really grateful that one of my girlfriends who’d been through menopause told me is that, although it sounds funny, you’re gonna miss your period when it’s gone – because you know that time in your life is finished. And I actually did experience some ruefulness around that.”
• October 18 is World Menopause Day.
Joanna Wane is an award-winning feature writer on the NZ Herald’s Lifestyle Premium team, with a special focus on social issues and the arts.
Telegraph: Major dry spells are common, but there are ways to get the spark back.