"When I'm out presenting education programmes for the police, we talk to parents' evenings and say, if something is going to happen to your child, chances are it will actually be somebody they know from their family or whānau group or something else like that.
"We've all got these stereotypes, but I guess the big thing is we need to move away from the panel vans, right? We need to move away from people in long trench coats who only live down dark alleys. I often say to parents when we're talking about that type of stuff, 'You need to lose the stereotypes'."
Instead, says Ward, there are some simple steps parents can take to help their children keep themselves safe.
Listen to Bryan’s full advice on the podcast from 16:32:
He says while it's important that children learn to interact with people in their wider circles, parents also need to encourage them to develop their intuition and identify when a situation doesn't feel safe.
"Knowing who their friends are in the neighbourhood and maybe waving out and saying hi, but also, if they're unsure, knowing that maybe it's time to go back and see their parents and say: "it made me feel uncomfortable". That's a great skill and an intuition that they and all people should have."
In cases where a child has gone missing, Ward says they're often found hiding somewhere at home.
"Very often we will get children disappearing. But nine times out of 10 they've hidden in a cupboard or under a bed because they're in trouble with Mum. You get the odd occasion when it is a serious incident. Maybe a toddler's gone for a walk and there's a nearby waterway. That's Eagle [helicopter], that's all the units we can muster, everything. Because losing a child's a real tragedy. They're taonga, treasures. It is one of those things we work really, really hard on. And most of the time it has a really good ending.
"We've got to remember, we only hear the worst-case stories. We never hear the good stories. I'm lucky, I'm in the position where, every now and then I'll get a card saying, 'Dear Constable Bryan, I was lost at the shopping mall and I remembered my name and address like you told me to'."
As delighted as Ward is to receive these notes, he is still "staggered" by "how many kids don't know their name and address".
"Name and address is a must. And a cell phone. I know for lots of kids won't be able to remember a cell phone number, but just a name and address is a good start. Even knowing Mummy's name. That will help people find you."
Ward says so many incidents could have been "easily solved if kids could logically think for themselves. To be able to take a couple of deep breaths and think, if Mummy was here, what would she tell me to do?"
He says if a child has become lost, equipping them with the ability to ask for help makes a big difference.
"Another good thing you can do is practice giving them some money and get them to pay for things sometimes. So they have an interaction with someone who is a stranger but it's in a controlled environment, with you nearby."
The same goes for interactions with law enforcement.
"Don't make your kids fearful of the police," says Ward. "If you're out shopping and you see us, come up and say hi, give us a high five. Introduce us to your child.
"Don't say, 'Here comes the police officer. I told you if you were naughty they'd come and take you away. Encourage positive interactions with police officers, as well as people with uniforms [like] firefighters.
"If your child gets lost, and we're trying to find that child and they see a group of police officers, we don't want it to turn into the scene from ET where they're all hiding and there's all the flashlights everywhere. We actually want them to stand up and say, 'I'm over here, police officers'."
• For more advice from Constable Bryan Ward on how to keep kids safe and navigate being out and about this Halloween, listen to this week's episode of One Day You'll Thank Me.
• You can follow the podcast at nzherald.co.nz, iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
