Be prepared to go au natural
Au naturel is not limited to your general nakedness as you deliver, it applies to what you pack. Remove the makeup from your hospital bag. Trust me, you do not require it. If you like to put on a face each day, then get used to not wearing it for some time. In fact, Covid should have prepared you beautifully for the ensuing months of little to no makeup and elasticated pants.
Begging is ugly, but it will happen
You may have it covered when the nurses come around in the hospital, but you will soon be begging to go back to the "hotel" that you are calling it now. Like a pregnant woman begging for more chocolate, you will pivot to pleading to call the hospital because you will be kicking yourself for not asking questions as to what exactly to do with this tiny human. Relax. Trust yourself and make use of free and paid resources available if you get stuck.
If you are emotional during pregnancy, wait until the other side
If you think the tears will stop once your baby is earthside, think again. You will cry for children born into difficult circumstances, for parents separated from their children, for kids whose parents don't show up at school events and for what your parents did for you. You will cry overwhelmed tears that your baby is here and like us, you cry five years on with adoration for your child. Feelings of love and pride never diminish, we just learn to live alongside them.
What goes around comes around
As you crow about your baby consuming green smoothies or vegetable curries, know that the more seasoned parent is nodding their head and waiting for your child to embrace their power of "no". Don't let that dent your pride, just know that no one escapes a child's defiance.
We need them as much as they need us. And that's okay
Sometimes, the only thing that keeps you going is their little face. Sometimes the only way you can be comforted is by holding their little body. You will say that you will never feel as loved as you are right now. Just as they need cuddles to grow and develop, our fragile emotional systems need them too.
You will never be ready for the next stage, whatever that is
When you are deep in a moment of separation anxiety or something hideously similar, a well-meaning individual will say, "this too shall pass", and you will want to thump them. Each stage brings a gain and a loss. Your newborn may become more responsive, but they may be wrigglier. You will be desperate for someone to occupy your overactive toddler, but that means they will begin a part of their life that doesn't solely revolve around you. You won't ever be fully ready for the next stage.
Parenthood is a blessing, not a right. New Zealand is a pro-choice country and each of us chose this path. I advise people to enjoy every moment, the good and bad because they make us parents, and that's what we wanted right?
