When your hairdresser is chatty but you're not in the mood.
Photo / 123RF
When your hairdresser is chatty but you're not in the mood.
Photo / 123RF
I really like the way my hairdresser does my hair, but she insists on chatting the whole time. I don't want to chat. How do I tell her to pipe down and do my hair? - Hair Hassles, Auckland.
Hairdressers play an important role in the fabric of our society. They are our therapists and our community watchdogs. They are one-on-one with people all day long and understand interpersonal communication more than those in most other jobs do.
A good hairdresser will be reading your body language when you sit in the chair, and adjusting his or her demeanor based on the vibe you're giving off. So, chances are your body language is more open and friendly than you apparently want it to be. Likely, you just think you're being polite, but your hairdresser is taking that as "let's chat at full steam for the whole hour!".
Your best approach during your next salon visit is therefore to change your physical mannerisms and verbal contact to be more "closed". This doesn't mean sitting silently with your arms crossed whilst looking at the ceiling, though.
Instead, as soon as you get into the chair, exclaim how much you've been looking forward to an hour of quiet relaxation while you get your hair done. Then, limit eye contact, or even close your eyes like you're going into a meditative state. Keep conversation on your hair. Give pleasant, but short answers to your hairdresser's questions. Look at your phone or get engrossed in a magazine if you can. Your hairdresser will eventually, as the minutes go by, start to understand that you're not up for a gossip session.
Also, it may pay to book a late afternoon appointment for all future salon visits. This should mean your hairdresser had already had a full day of gasbagging and might even appreciate a client who just wants to sit silently.
My friends always buy me drinks I don't want and force them on me. I know they just want me to have fun, but how do I turn them down? - Begrudging Boozer, Wellington.
It's not easy to say no to your mates.
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It's difficult to explain to drunk friends, or friends that plan on getting drunk, that you're not up for the same kind of night out as they are. Using white lies such as "I'm driving" or "I have an early start tomorrow" are not usually the most effective ways to get your message across, either.
Next time you go out on the town, ensure you buy your own drink and always nip quietly to the bar when required to ensure you never have an empty glass in hand. If you need a breather and don't want another alcoholic beverage, a soda water with a wedge lime looks like a vodka mix. Say "no thanks, I've got one" as much as possible when round offers arise.
If a friend buys a round without even checking your refilling requirements, just leave yours in the middle of the table and offer it another friend who will happily drink it for you. Or, don't be afraid to just get up for a moment and leave it on a bench somewhere. Better a wasted drink than a wasted drinker.
On the weekend I found myself unable to get into my car because the car next to me had parked ridiculously close (could barely open the door enough to get my arm in), while leaving themselves plenty of room on their driver's side. I ended up climbing in through another door. What does one do in this situation? Leave a note? Mess with their car? Call a towie? - Puzzled about Parking, Auckland.
How to deal with carpark issues.
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Firstly, never mess with their car. How would you feel if you were simply in a rush and didn't park appropriately, and returned to your vehicle minutes later to discover someone had keyed your door for a simple oversight?
You could call the council's parking wardens (or inform security if you're in a mall, supermarket, or private parking lot), but only if the other car's wheels are over the designated lines.
Otherwise, there's little you can do in this situation but leave a friendly note on the dash and hope the person doesn't do it again. Perhaps next time you might try parking closer to the middle of both painted lines yourself, too, which should give you adequate space to re-enter your car, provided others respect these lines.
