KEY POINTS:
You may be a dedicated foodie, but your mother can't spot the difference between sourdough and sliced bread.
Your mother fills the pantry with gooey delights, and you've got a ban on sugar. You're like chalk and Gouda cheese.
But when pressed for comment, most mothers and daughters ignore their lifestyle differences to bond over a special family dish. It's usually a much-loved recipe, crinkled and stained with overuse, featuring all too familiar ingredients. It's a culinary heirloom, as cherished as your family photo album.
Even top cooks acknowledge the wise ways of their mothers. The formidable Tamasin Day-Lewis defers to her mum in Tamasin's Kitchen Bible: "The perfect omelette, my mother always used to tell me, should take as long to cook as it takes to recite a sonnet, which happens to be 55 seconds."
Wellington restaurateur Maria Pia De Razza-Klein praises her Italian mama for her knowledge of flour and her dexterity with pasta.
And perhaps the sweetest of all, London teenager Sam Stern - author of Real Food, Real Fast - admits his mother Susan was the inspiration behind his collection of tasty, healthy food ideas.
Our local foodies are no different. Viva talks to three women who praise their mums and grandmothers for helping them shape their working lives.
JAN GARDNER
Meola Kitchen, Westmere
Growing up in Gisborne with a large garden, Gardner is used to cooking from the land - "The only food my mother bought was frozen peas."
It's understandable, then, she's ever so slightly frustrated with the tiny courtyard out the back of her newly-opened Meola Kitchen.
"It's charming, but then I'm used to a lot more land for growing."
When this mum-of-two boys opened The Moa Room in San Francisco, she offered patrons borderless cuisine - which featured herbs and vegetables grown from the restaurant's own garden and orchard at the Lazy Susan Ranch in Calistoga.
Gardner was responsible for planning and planting the extensive garden, which was later developed into a commercial garden selling more than 100 culinary herbs.
"My philosophy revolves around access to seasonal fruits and vegetables and that's also my mother's philosophy."
A graduate of the professional chef's programme at the Californian Culinary Academy in San Francisco, Gardner worked at Wolfgang Puck's renowned Postrio restaurant before starting her own catering company and teaching cooking. But when she returned home to celebrate her mother Mary's 70th birthday, she baked a cake using a much-loved family recipe.
"My mother loves chocolate and coconut, so I made her a giant cake. It's like her signature dish - and my sons love it."
For Mother's Day, Meola Kitchen is offering special takeaways: two-course meals or a complete dinner party menu.
What was special about your mum's garden?
Her street in Gisborne won "Best Street of the Year" twice, largely due to her garden. Her flower garden always had something going on with a lot of colour.
What did she grow in the garden?
My mother's other hobby was floral art. She liked bright colours and strong forms in the garden. The vegetable garden was largely my father's domain, but together they grew the bulk of our fruit and vegetables.
How has your mum influenced you? By giving me a sense of getting close to the food source. We would only buy fish from the wharf in Gisborne that had been caught that day. That appreciation of real freshness and food at its absolute peak is a guiding principle of my daily cooking life.
What are you growing in your Meola Kitchen garden?
Mostly kitchen herbs such as thyme, sage, mint, although we also have artichokes, passionfruit, guavas, chilies and our current favourite Toscana di salvo.
So what is the appeal of your mum's signature dish - chocolate coconut slice?
Kids love it. It's sinfully addictive. It's the perfect balance of crunchy base with creamy chocolaty coconut topping.
What are your sons' favourite dishes?
Roman, my 9-year-old, would go for prawn dumplings any time. For Otis, my 16-year-old, tamales have long been his favourite, reflecting his first 10 years of upbringing in San Francisco's Hispanic Mission District.
What are you planning for Mother's Day?
Hopefully burnt bacon and cold eggs to start followed by Yum Cha.
YAEL SHOCHAT
Ima, Auckland CBD
Dine at Auckland's Ima cafe and restaurant and you've arrived at the motherland. As owner Yael Shochat translates, "It's Hebrew for mother."
So the owner of this culinary haven is heavily influenced by her mother Thelma?
"I can't stop the urge to feed everyone. It's the Jewish mother thing - the answer to every problem is you feed it."
Growing up in Israel, this ebullient chef was surrounded by a vibrant mix of flavours, tastes and textures from across the Jewish diaspora.
The cook says her culinary repertoire is heavily influenced by the cuisine of the sun, which interweaves a heady mix of dishes from Spain to the Balkans.
Try Ima's Cypriot salad and there's no doubting you're basking in something heaven-sent. "We're aiming for a sense of celebration of our food and we only use the best ingredients - even if we have to go to great lengths to ensure our customers have them."
What are your childhood memories of cooking in your homeland?
The rich diversity of food from the different diasporas. Moroccan food made a huge impression on me, but mostly it was the local Arab food.
My family is from Eastern Europe and my grandmother was English, so it was a big mixture but mainly because my mother was so focused on food and trying new things.
She was an avid collector of recipes and cookbooks in an era when hardly anyone had any.
"I was reading cookbooks from the age of 10 and I really liked a French one my mother had.
"I cooked a full French four-course meal for my family when I was 13, it was so heavy and rich that no one could get up at the end of it.
What did your mother cherish most about food?
My mother was always trying something new, always buying new things. She was a nurse and a solo mum as my dad died in the six-day war and I think she spent most of her money on food.
What lessons did you learn from your mother?
Well, she taught me a hell of a lot of techniques from segmenting oranges to making yeast doughnuts filled with home-made jam. She was very good.
What would your mother think of Ima?
I think she would be so proud of me with Ima Cuisine. I didn't name the restaurant after my mother but it's my philosophy of good simple food that is not only tasty, it makes you feel good - like Mum's food does. I wouldn't be a food-focused person if it wasn't for my mum.
What are you planning for Mother's Day?
We celebrated last Sunday because I'll be feeding all the other mothers at Ima this Sunday.
JENNY MILLER
Fred Samuels. Freemans Bay
It's funny how life goes. Jenny Miller used to play grocers as a child, and now she co-owns an upmarket deli with rows and rows of food to sort. She could blame her grandma Manu for her new career.
Most days, she would gather up the young Miller, and armed with a shopping list would head to Hutchinson's deli in Remuera, and the bakery across the road. Her shopping criteria was strict. She would only select the best ingredients for the family meal.
Miller would spend hours shopping with her grandmother and never minded the challenge of selecting fresh produce and exotic ingredients.
"At a very early age, I could taste the difference between quality and bland food."
She says it makes sense that she now owns a speciality deli store, which is expanding to supply meat and vegetables - some of it organic. Named after her two sons, Fred Samuels is the ideal place to buy goodies before rushing home to rustle up a gourmet meal for Mother's Day.
And Miller, who was a television director before opening the deli, says buying good quality deli food is a great way to fudge the effect of slaving over the stove. As director of the acclaimed documentary series Family Life - which followed several families over a 10-year period from pregnancy onwards - Miller says family members can have a huge influence on your culinary habits.
"My grandmother and I have the same approach to food - fresh is always best."
What do you remember most from your shopping expeditions with grandma Manu?
Shopping with my grandmother was great, she always bought me what I wanted, the best food from the old deli, Hutchinson's and the bakery along the road. My brother and I were very spoilt by her but appreciated every minute of it of course.
Did you pick up any tips about buying produce as a youngster?
I learned that you buy the best you can and you don't need to do a whole lot to it.
How has this influenced you in the job?
I have a natural interest in food that I think has always been there - I love to eat it and cook it and talk about it.
I think Fred Samuels is a relaxed environment to shop in. It's easy to pick up what you need or want for your meal and we like to keep it fresh, tasty and interesting. There's always a bargain here but also lots of quality. All of that goes back to how we used to shop - frequently - and it was pleasant, not belting around a supermarket.
What do you remember best about your gran's cooking?
Gran's cooking was always delicious. Best ingredients, fresh fish, really good pork sausages, aged cheddar and cakes are some of the standout things - and of course the chocolate fudge cake in the cupboard.
Did you get to lick the bowl?
Always licked the bowl, best part. How could you not?
Any plans for Mothers Day?
Mother's Day will be with my children Freddy and Sam and my mother Ann. We'll probably go out for breakfast and then go out to Muriwai for a surf.