Life lessons: Carolyn Henwood

Judge Carolyn Henwood at the Circa Theatre, Wellington. Photo / Mark Mitchell

My first memory was as a toddler when I decided to take my little friend on a tour on foot via the Seatoun Tunnel. It was dark and we were lost. Thank goodness my parents had taught me my name and address so we could be rescued.

As for my first ambition, that was to be a reporter. I thought it would thrilling to sleuth out stories and pursue the scoop, although back then women were only able to write about recipes and fashion shows. Then I had a chance to study law, a completely radical idea for a girl in the 1960s, and I grabbed it with both hands.

Being appointed as a woman judge in 1985 was still a novel concept. People came to stare and see how I would handle it. In my first week on the job I fell off my chair while sitting on the bench of the Auckland District Court. That took some recovery time. It wasn't the first time I wondered "what the hell am I doing?" I think this constantly, life's a challenge but I love every minute of it.

When I was first appointed to the District Court I received a letter from an eminent Justice of the New Zealand Court of Appeal. He advised me to "shut up" and reminded me my role as a judge was to listen — something he said the legal profession frequently seemed to forget.

I get angry when people deliberately misrepresent the law or are unjust to people, particularly young people. The last thing like that to make me angry was the citizens' referendum. I dream of a future where adults and children have equal rights under the law.

I believe in building a tolerant society where people can live without fear and prejudice. I also believe fervently in arts and culture and have donated most of my free time to professional theatre, Circa Theatre in particular. My husband Ray has been an actor for 40 years and our son Dai is carving himself an exciting career as a comedian.

My last belly laugh was while watching our son's comedy show, 7 Days. I know I'm a biased mother, but he really did deserve it, the quick-witted scallywag.

My guilty pleasure is always that chocolate eclair or that extra glass of fine New Zealand wine, which is probably why it would be a total waste of money for me to enroll at a gym. The last time I tried I never went and my wallet was the only thing that got thinner. Golf seems a better bet. I'm a high handicapper, but at least I get the walk.

Despite my own public role and having a famous son, I think people would be surprised to hear that my mother was Miss Dilworth and her father was a close relative of the founder of the Dilworth School. She went to St Cuthberts in Auckland and excelled in tennis and hockey.

Judge Henwood was the first female District Court judge to be appointed in Wellington and the third female District Court judge to be appointed in New Zealand. She is now chair of the Confidential Listening and Assistance Service, which offers people a chance to be heard by an independent panel if they have historic allegations of abuse or neglect while in the care of the state before 1992.