For the curious, open-minded, but misinformed heterosexuals out in the world, there seems to be one burning question they always want to ask us homosexual men. Do you all just want to have sex with each other all the time?
Usually, though not exclusively, I get this question from well-intentioned straight male friends and acquaintances. Often over a drink because a certain amount of Dutch Courage is required to be so bold with a question like that. When I tell them that gay men don't want to have sex with everything that moves, sometimes I feel a sense of disappointment. As if they thought it would be a wonderful experience to be so oversexed, you could literally just find somebody like you and go at it.
This fallacy comes from the tired old thought that all men think about sex every seven seconds. Speaking from first-hand experience, there is a little truth out there that SOME gay guys are hypersexualised and live in a world where hooking up is seemingly their life's raison d'être. There are also lots of straight guys out there who, based on the way they talk with their friends, are seemingly up for sex whenever they could possibly get it.
Thus is the assumption: if men want sex all the time, and you're a man whose preference is men, surely any man will do and there's a smorgasbord of sexual opportunities out there for you. Yet this isn't the case. Here's why.