"What does it mean if I'm a "people pleaser"? Is it a bad thing?
It's one of those strange ideas in the self-help books isn't it? Who wouldn't want to please people, and how could that be a bad thing?
What we normally mean when we talk about some one being a "people pleaser" is someone who tends to put others needs, wants, desires ahead of their own. And there's the rub.
Balancing needs in relationships, our own with those of the other person, is a constant juggling act, sometimes we give, sometimes we receive. The ebb and flow is normal, but if all the giving heads in one direction then it tends to create problems.
Resentment is the biggest red flag. If we are unable to say no, to set limits, or stop ourselves being generous, resentment is inevitable. But it's also a trap of our own making when we're the one offering too much, not communicating, and not tending to our own needs.