Kid couture

Young models at the Trelise Cooper Kids show at Air New Zealand Fashion Week 2007. Photo / Glenn Jeffrey

She looked a fright. She quite often does when I dress her. But the other morning, while her mum was having a sleep-in, I dressed Mia for the day and after my first attempt she looked particularly horrendous.

I guess I was trying to get creative and fun - God knows why, since it was only 7am - by teaming up pinks, greens, and stripes.

And the purple socks didn't help either - but hey, they were the only clean ones in the draw.

I thought better of the outfit and was in and out of her room a couple more times, rifling through the draws, trying to get a cool combo together.

I finally settled on the safe, tried-and-true option of green, blue and pink.

This might be a generalisation (sorry to all you stylish chaps out there) but if there's one thing us blokes are sure to be worse at than the ladies it's getting the kids dressed.

Luckily, thanks to the evil fashion eye of her mum, Mia has rarely been out in public looking either a fright, or like I used to in my university days (that's a mix of op shop chic and tramp couture).

Look, even now I can hardly dress myself, which is why I wear a uniform of jeans, t-shirt, jersey, and tatty Chuck Taylors.

Some might say that's sad, I say it's easy. And put simply, I don't really care.

So I'm not really qualified to co-ordinate ensembles for a cool looking kid, which is unfortunate for wee honey lamb.

Right from the time she was born I never really got it right.

My wife was either, 'Oh no. What's daddy done to you', like I was on trial for a war crime rather than a fashion faux pas, or if I was lucky it was the more sensitive approach of, 'No. How 'bout something nice. Nana's coming to stay'.

These days I'm better, but still a dithering and indecisive mess when it comes time to choose.

And I don't even want to think about the politics, the arguments, and the expense of kitting out a teenager - or two - in years to come.

Which is why - all going well - Mia will be off to a high school with a uniform.

Then again, by that stage I won't have much say over what she wears.

But over my dead body will she be walking out that door wearing a mini skirt...