Kerre McIvor: Give it up for a happy Christmas

My daughter was a festive freak and she loved the traditions associated with Christmas. Photo / Getty Images

Merry Christmas Eve! I hope you and your loved ones have a joyous day tomorrow.

I've been a bit grinchy this year. For years, when I was doing night-time talkback, I'd exhort people to get into the festive spirit.

My daughter was a festive freak and she loved the traditions associated with Christmas. So we'd go and select a tree in the first week of December, a process that involved the whole family, including Toby the border collie.

Kate was the artistic director in charge of decorating the tree and we always had to play Christmas carols while doing the job. We have a nativity scene with beautifully carved figurines that would be set out in the fireplace and much thought was given to gift giving.

Most Christmases we'd have family members and waifs and strays around the table and the merriment went up exponentially when Kate's friends would come around after family commitments had been completed.

Christmas was loud and riotous and fun — but now that Kate has her own family and is living on the other side of the world, it's just not the same.

We decided not to go over to London this Christmas as we've had two glorious months with Kate and the new grandson. They left only a fortnight ago. And we have plans to visit them in the middle of next year.

But now I totally understand where my callers were coming from when they said they couldn't really be bothered.

We have no tree. And I only put the nativity scene up a week ago. I thought we were having no presents but there was a little bit of panic buying on my part when the husband informed me, with just a few days to go, that he'd never signed up for the no-present thing and while he didn't want anything, he would certainly be buying me something.

We have a friend and her mum coming for Christmas lunch so that will be lovely but I can guarantee it will be a lot tamer than Christmases past.

The only time I really got into the festive spirit was when I went shopping for my family that I'd been allocated through the Salvation Army. We've been doing this for years and I've written about it before. Families who are clients of the Salvation Army's are nominated by the course leaders to be a part of the programme. Donors are given the first names of the members of the family and the ages of the children and then it's up to you to give them a special Christmas.

You never get to meet them — the Sallies act as intermediaries. This year, I had a single dad and two little girls, aged 4 and 5, the perfect age to enjoy Christmas.

I had so much fun shopping for them and I hope they get as much joy opening their presents as I had buying them.

It shouldn't really count as a good deed when you enjoy it so much. But it's universally acknowledged that giving is just as beneficial, if not more so, than receiving.

The more generous people are, the happier, healthier and the more purpose in life they enjoy.

Paradoxically, it's generally poorer families and poorer countries that give the most. The World Giving Index rates 140 countries in three categories: helping a stranger, donating money and volunteering and last year Myanmar came out on top, followed by Indonesia and Kenya.

We came fourth; we're generally in the top five and we have seen just how generous this country can be — to one another and to people in crisis overseas — time and time again.

I know Christmas can be a strain on many families at this time of year — we've seen the queues at the City Mission as parents are forced to rely on the kindness of strangers so their kids can have a special day. But I know that there are many more generous Kiwis who are doing their bit to ensure as many children as possible experience the magic of Christmas.

Have a beautiful day.