Added to the round up of usual suspects (i.e. relationship difficulties) aired in my counselling practice, compatibility and technology are increasingly cropping up as a major concern for couples.
And it's not just the rather common occurrence of sneaking peeks at each other's phones. We now have a whole host of other issues, with technology's capacity to throw obstacles into couples' paths growing seemingly by the week.
'Phubbing', for example - a term that was actually coined a couple of years ago, to merge "phone" and "snubbing". Cue: "He's always on his phone when I'm trying to talk to him" / "She uses the phone when we're out with friends" / "He pulls out the phone and checks it at dinner".
A team from Baylor University in Texas recently surveyed couples about phubbing and noted that the outcome for all behaviours led to decreased relationship satisfaction. They noted participants with an "anxious attachment style" suffered most intensely.
That's hardly surprising given the evolutionary role of eye contact in brain chemistry. Within hours of birth, eye-to-eye contact creates the fundamental building blocks of social communication and remains our means of engagement, refuge, connection and acceptance - on a daily basis.
