Jana has issues with the term "Daddy" being used in the bedroom. Photo / Getty Images
OPINION:
There’s a super gross term going around at the moment but it’s really turning on some women.
I’m seeing it all over my Instagram pages and recently a bloke tried to get me to use it in the bedroom, which was a total deflator.
It’s the word “Daddy” and I’m not a fan.
We were fooling around like lusty teenagers, and he looked me deep in the eyes and goes: “Call me Daddy”. The slightly repulsed look on my face made him give an awkward laugh and say: “I’m just joking!” But he wasn’t dear reader, he wasn’t.
It’s right up there with grown women who talk to their partners in baby talk. Seriously, is there anything grosser than sitting next to a couple who are like: “Does my little muffin want a kiss?” “Yes your little muffin does want a kiss.” You’re gagging now as you read this aren’t you … I am.
But wait. There’s now been a further expansion on the word: You can now either be a plain ol’ “Daddy” or a “Zaddy”, which according to the Webster dictionary is classified as an older “daddy” who is attractive, has extra swag, and good fashion sense.
Honestly, I can barely keep up! So basically Harry Styles would be classified as a Daddy, and George Clooney a “Zaddy”.
So why is everyone going ga-ga for it? One of the highest-rating podcasts on Spotify right now is called Call her Daddy and don’t get me wrong, it’s an absolute banger of a podcast – but the title is designed to be sexy, because, as you can imagine the fabulous female who hosts it, Alexandra Cooper, talks a lot about sex (marvellous!).
She even calls her listeners “Daddy gang.”
Now as a listener, I want no part in this “Daddy gang” but do you know what … many women do! So I decided to investigate further.
I started with the blokes. One guy friend revealed that if a woman called him “Daddy” he would run for the hills because she clearly had some form of ‘daddy issues’.
His friends agreed.
So then I took it to my girlfriends for their opinion. I asked one particular friend if it was perhaps a creepy Freudian daddy issues thing and she laughed and said absolutely not. She said the term Daddy indicates masculine energy, dominance and gave her man the idea that he was in charge in the bedroom.
Okay, okay I’m beginning to understand, and yes, that description sounds pretty darn sexy to me, but I fear it will carry outside of the bedroom. If we stroke a bloke’s ego between the sheets, will he start thinking he can dominate us in the real world as well?
Or am I really overthinking it? I mean, I like a bit of bedroom rough-and-tumble play but I’m certainly not putting up with it in the office.
I decided the final place I need to go for answers was the trusty Reddit forums – they are filled with gloriously unfiltered opinions from all walks of life. Most people on there seemed to agree that the term Daddy was mostly used by women who like to be the submissive one in their relationship.
Cool – I get it, but does it have to be THAT word? Can’t we call them something like “boss” or “tiger” or heck, I don’t know … perhaps “Captain” - just anything that is far removed from an actual family member. Gross, gross, gross.
Now listen, if I was absolutely pushed to call a bloke by that name, I’m going to be honest, there are only three men in this whole darn world I would call “Daddy” and they are Brett Goldstein (aka Roy from Ted Lasso), Brad Pitt (circa Legend of the Falls era) and Michael B Jordan.
Actually, let’s throw Rip from Yellowstone in there as well. Because, good lord, I would call those guys whatever they darn wanted. But unless you are on my bucket list, kindly keep that term well away from me.
And as a final note, can we also throw bub, stud muffin, and baby girl in the rubbish pile as well. They all have the major ick factor.