One mum has raised the issue of whether it's okay to change your baby's nappy in a cafe. Photo / 123rf
One mum has raised the issue of whether it's okay to change your baby's nappy in a cafe. Photo / 123rf
If you’re a parent, you’ve probably experienced this scenario: you’re out and about with your baby, browsing a few shops or sitting down for a coffee, when you realise it’s time to change your child’s nappy.
And however organised you might be, chances are there isn’t a family bathroom within close range.
One Kiwi mum found herself in that scenario - but her solution has left other parents divided. Posting on the Facebook parenting group Mums Hub, the woman, who chose to remain anonymous, revealed she and her partner had taken their baby for a walk into town.
“We sat down to have an iced coffee. Before we left, I noticed our baby needed changing, so I automatically started grabbing things out from the stroller basket and preparing to change him,” she wrote on the forum.
Her partner, however, was shocked and in “pure disbelief” at what she was about to do.
“[He] told me that it’s rude and disrespectful. I responded by saying that babies are a part of society too, it’s normal, all mothers do it/should be able to do it etc,” she continued.
The mum went on to explain that there was just one other diner in the café and she wanted to change her child on the comfortable booth chair.
“I have a change mat that rolls out of the diaper bag, and it takes me literally one minute to change him really quick in public. Also, the toilets didn’t have a changing station - and typically won’t in small-town local cafes,” she explained.
Other parents chimed in on whether the controversial move was okay.
Despite her partner’s comments, she finished changing her baby, and explained that she then chose to go on the forum to ask other parents their opinion.
“Is it okay? Do you do it? How normal is it? A quick Google search about this, and there were articles about mothers being shamed and [people saying] that doing this isn’t proper etiquette for a place where food is consumed, so now I’m unsure.
“We’re mothers and we do what we have to do for our babies. I’m interested to hear what you think.”
It wasn’t clear whether other customers or the cafe staff took issue with the move, but other parents were quick to chime in with their thoughts.
Some pointed out that it could be a hygiene issue, with one commenting, “Better go to the bathroom in food settings - no judgement from me though”, while another wrote, “No one wants to smell your child’s poo while they’re trying to eat or have a drink”. Another parent simply labelled the move “gross”.
Another member of the group, who works as a chef, replied, “This is how food poisoning happens and spreads ... you could actually kill someone with a weak immune system.”
One noted that it was a potential privacy issue for the child, warning, “You don’t know who could be watching.”
But others mourned the fact that we don’t “live in a society where people find a nappy change totally normal and children/parents come first”.
Another said there was “nothing unhygienic” about changing a baby’s wet nappy in a cafe, likening it to the debate over public breastfeeding. “That’s like saying, don’t feed your baby in a public place too because it’s ‘gross’.”
One parenting site, Natural Baby Life, recommends that if you do have to change your baby in a public place, it’s best to do it as discreetly as you can.
“Public restrooms, your vehicle, or a stroller are the best places for changing, but bringing the right supplies on the trip will allow you to change your baby anywhere that is out of the way of others.”
They note that if you change your baby in a restaurant or café, the smell can disrupt others’ dining experience and lead to complaints from other guests or staff.
