'I had to choose which son to save': Mum's agonising decision as tsunami hit

An Australian mum has opened up about the heartbreaking decision she had to make during the Boxing Day tsunami in 2004 - which child to save.

Nearly 16 years ago, a devastating tsunami killed more than 227,000 people across 14 countries.

For Jillian Searle, it started as a beautiful day with family fun around the beach-front resort pool. Hours later their holiday in Thailand would change their lives forever.

Down by the pool, Searle noticed hundreds of birds flying away from the beach. Then moments later a roar echoed around the family," she told That's Life.

Suddenly a massive wave crashed over the hotel wall, ripping apart everything in its path.

"Run, run, run," Searle screamed as she grabbed Lachie, 5, and Blake, almost 2, by the hand.

The trio sprinted to towards the hotel lobby but the water was catching up with them.

They reached for the breakfast bar in a bid to climb onto higher land, but the water was just metres away.

There wasn't enough room for Searle, Lachie and Blake.

"Someone please help me," she cried.

With seconds until the tsunami came crashing into the hotel, Searle had to make a heartbreaking decision - which son she would hold on to and which son she would hand to another girl and hope they survived.

With Blake less than 2 years old, Searle decided he couldn't survive on his own and decided to hold onto him, meaning she would pass Lachie to a stranger and pray he made it.

Talking to Sky News, Searle said at the time she felt immense guilt and was thinking: "How am I going to go on living with the fact maybe I should have tried to keep hold of him?"

Seconds later the tsunami came crashing into the hotel, dragging Searle and Blake under.

The pair were pinned to the ground, with Searle thinking "he's going to die in my arms".

After being tossed and turned like inside a washing machine, Searle eventually resurfaced for air.

The Boxing Day tsunami killed more than 227,000 people. Photo / Getty

Blake began to scream. He was alive.

But the swirling water came back and pushed the pair against a wall, crushing them and leaving Searle thinking this was the end of her life.

As fast as the water had come in, it was started to wash away. Both Searle and Blake had survived.

Her attention turned to the son she had to let go, Lachie.

The girl she handed Lachie to was clinging to a tree for dear life, but Lachie was nowhere to be seen.

"I'm so sorry," she cried. "I had to let him go."

After reuniting with her husband Brad, the sirens sounded waning of an incoming second wave.

Searle and Blake anchored themselves around a wooden platform, praying they survived the second wave.

Brad went looking for Lachie, wading through strong waves and debris.

After the second wave had come and gone, the family made it to the rooftop where others were seeking shelter.

Lachie was nowhere to be seen. "He's gone," Brad choked.

For two hours Searle was inconsolable, thinking she had lost her son Lachie.

Then she overheard a man talking about a boy he had found.

"He's got a blue rashie on," the man said.

The boy with the blue rashie happened to be Lachie.

"I rushed over to wrap my arms around him. Somehow, my boy had escaped with just a scratch on his head," Searle told That's Life.

"Mummy, I'm really dirty and I need a shower,' he said.

Jillian Searle with her sons Blake and Lachie. Photo / Family handout

After being separated from the others in the lobby, he had stood on a toilet nearby. "I felt like I'd won the lottery."

After a holiday from hell, the family managed to book a flight back home to Australia the next day.

More than 15 years on, Lachie celebrated his 20th birthday, while Blake turned 16.

Blake was too young to remember the tsunami, but Lachie can recall every detail.

As a young boy, he faced recurring nightmares before counselling helped bring an end to them.

All these years on, he doesn't blame his mother for letting go of his hand.

"You made the right decision in letting me go," he's said.

Searle says years after the chaotic holiday that nearly cost them their lives, she catches herself staring at her boys and is amazed they're all standing here today.

"Every moment we get to spend together is a miracle."