Burnout is complex and can be difficult to deal with. Photo / Getty Images
Burnout is complex and can be difficult to deal with. Photo / Getty Images
Are you already feeling stretched after a couple of weeks back at work? Get yourself back on an even keel when it comes to handling burnout, advises mental health expert Bev Aisbett in this edited extract from The Book of Burnout.
Burnout is complex.
It’s most commonly associated with the workplace or when a person takes on extra responsibility and feels overworked, overbooked, and indispensable – but burnout is far more nuanced than just being busy or overwhelmed by responsibilities.
The World Health Organisation’s 2019 classification of burnout is that it’s a syndrome that results from chronic workplace stress that’s not successfully managed.
The focus is on the workplace, but anyone who has lived through the last few years can testify that burnout is more far-reaching and diverse in its impact than this definition.
Covid burnout is real, and it could be said that it is as much a pandemic as the physical version, affecting an entire population regardless of whether or not they are in the office, even – or especially – if that office is at home. There are many ways to burn out:
Over it
Something that was once pleasurable now holds little joy because of over-exposure.
Repeating something too often until it becomes a chore.
Unfinished business
Starting one thing, then moving on to another before the first one is finished. Having too many “irons in the fire” leads to stress over uncompleted tasks.
Push, push, push
This type of burnout can arise from a vicious cycle of feeding off adrenalin. You’re dog-tired but you keep pushing on and can’t seem to stop.
Superhero syndrome
You make yourself indispensable and so you become that. You are always ‘on call’ and can never rest.
Plagued by FOMO
Fear of missing out means exhausting yourself by trying to keep up with current trends or fit in with the status quo.
We often associate burnout with working too much, but it can also happen when you’re not challenged or feel just plain bored.
Taken to the limit
It’s all more than you can handle. The demands on you have outweighed the resources you have to deal with them.
On this last point, it is important to note that everyone has a different tipping point. One person may be able to keep going far beyond someone else’s limit.
Unfortunately, experts don’t always agree on what burnout actually is. As a consequence, burnout is not readily or easily recognised or diagnosed as a health issue. As a result, it is often left up to the individual to assess whether what they are experiencing is burnout or not.
In depression, negative thoughts and feelings tend to focus on all areas of life and include low self-esteem, hopelessness, and often suicidal ideations, so “taking a break” may not be a solution (and may actually exacerbate the depression). If you feel this way, you should seek specialised care from a trained professional.
If you don’t make changes to the situation that is causing your burnout, however, you may set yourself up for depression.
Physical illness or certain medications can cause symptoms such as fatigue.
Before you conclude that you have burnout, explore other possible causes for your tiredness with your doctor first.
But a stressful lifestyle, typical of those with burnout, can put people under extreme pressure to the point of exhaustion.
Exhaustion is a normal reaction to stress – it is not necessarily a sign of disease but feeling stressed all the time is not normal or healthy.
Do you feel that you are tied to a situation requiring self-sacrifice?
Do you feel that you have no choice but to be available?
Do you think that no one else can do things as well as you?
Are you operating from absolutes? Do you act as if you are invincible or that your own health and wellbeing are of secondary importance?
If you have answered yes to these questions, you are very likely to put yourself into burnout.
Of course, but to what degree? Are you sacrificing your wellbeing for an idea of duty? Overwork and stress aren’t badges of honour – they’re signs that you’re doing too much.
Burnout is insidious because it tends to creep up on you.
It’s not a matter of being fine one day and burned out the next.
It is possible to burn yourself out on a temporary basis (such as organising an event), but in this case, the burnout is likely to be passing rather than an ongoing condition. There are plenty of warning signs, including physical, mental, and emotional symptoms.
Nobody is going to rescue you or successfully intervene until you decide to change the way you do life.
Let’s not kid ourselves – changing how you behave is not easy, but it is doable.
And the best way to start is by starting. By making small changes, you can begin to see that there is another way, which feels a whole lot better.
If you need some help – ask for it. This might mean recruiting a life coach or counsellor to help you break some old, entrenched patterns and address the fears that keep you stalled.
There are no guarantees of “happy ever after” in any situation, so why not follow your heart?
Of course, it may be too stressful to leave your job but there are still things you can do to improve how you work. What if you set the intention, “I want to feel inspired and challenged every day”? How might this convert stress into passion?
If your job has been stressful enough to affect your health, talk to your boss and ask for help in reviewing the expectations placed upon you against your ability to meet them. Ask them for what you need to ease the load.
Here are some tips to help you move on:
· Get social and stay social. Hanging out and letting loose with others can have numerous benefits, such as a sense of belonging, increased self-esteem, more relaxation, and a greater sense of security.
· Make your own wellbeing the priority task. Make being your best self the goal. Your best self is not this driven, exhausted, over-stretched being. Your best self is well-rested, has plenty of energy, is enthusiastic, easily manages tasks, eats well, has fun - and enjoys life.
· Add things to your to-do list, not just work things. How about giving the same priority to pleasure and relaxation as you have to your work list?
· Learn to say no. When you say “no” to something you don’t like or want, you’re actually saying “yes” to yourself. You’re affirming that you have a right to disagree with or refuse something that is not in your best interest. You are also recognising that your time, energy, and health are every bit as important as everyone else’s.
· Learn to delegate. Have you actually asked for help? People may not be used to you not asking – they might think you’re managing. Your fierce independence may have sent a message to people that they are not needed, and people like to be needed. You may be surprised at how willing others may be to help you when you admit that you’re struggling.
· Be a friend to yourself. Would you really put someone you cared about through such a punishing routine? Start being kinder to yourself. You have as much right to be happy, peaceful and enjoy life as anyone else. Why should you be exempt?
And of course, know when to stop. When you let go of doing too much, you make room for doing just enough. You now have the space to fill with whatever you have been missing.
Book that holiday, take that pleasure trip, dig the garden, do that course, take up art or adopt a pet. Do whatever the hell you actually like. Haven’t you earned it?
A word of warning – keep an eye on yourself. It can be way too easy to slip back into your old habits and, before you know it, you’re back in burnout again.
The Book Of Burnout by Bev Aisbett (HarperCollins, RRP $24.99).
The Book Of Burnout by Bev Aisbett (HarperCollins, RRP $24.99).
