Fantastic Four

(Herald rating: * *)

Just when superhero movies were looking like they were setting the standard for popcorn entertainment, along comes one to remind us that sometimes they're just product.

It doesn't lack for flash, but Fantastic Four is a movie in which the abundant special effects quickly dull the senses. And when it's not delivering digital overload, the film induces a tedium from the acting, dialogue and too many scenes where having four superheroes to juggle proves just too much for first-time feature director Mark Story.

Fantastic Four does achieve something. It's manages to be even more of a cartoon than The Incredibles, which happily ripped off its original premise - the superhero team cum family - as well as many of its superpowers.

But although it stole ideas, that great animated feature had heart and something to say, whereas FF has Jessica Alba's cleavage and Michael Chiklis (of television's The Shield) as Ben Grimm/Thing in a lumpen brown costume that just begs that unfortunate phrase "polish a turd".

It also has Ioan Gruffud as elasti-bloke Mr Fantastic, Chris Evans as Johnny Storm/the Human Torch, and Nip/Tuck's Julian McMahon as their nemesis Doctor Doom. The five are scientists or astronauts affected by cosmic radiation that altered their DNA. They cope with their powers in different ways. For instance, Johnny enjoys the attention, Grimm freaks out. New York embraces its new super-celebrities, then it's the four in the blue jumpsuits versus the metal-faced Doom.

Fantastic Four of the 1960s-origin comic was indeed fantastic, but this movie just pads out the creation story while awaiting the silly final showdown with Doom.

No, it doesn't take itself as seriously as Batman Begins, X-Men, The Hulk or the Spiderman flicks. It seems aimed at a younger audience who don't know their Marvel from their D.C. comics - although even they might wonder why they've already seen all the best bits in the trailer.

Unlike the other superhero films, FF only requires you to go "geewhiz" about the superpowers and not care about the characters behind them. That makes Four a snore and a waste of good popcorn.

CAST: Jessica Alba, Michael Chiklis, Ioan Gruffudd, Julian McMahon, Chris Evans
DIRECTOR: Tim Story
RATING: M (Violence)
RUNNING TIME: 105min
SCREENING: Village, Hoyts Berkeley