At last! A scientist who has turned his mind to one of the great mysteries of the universe - how to make a really great Christmas mince pie.
You may know Peter Molan as the honey man - the Waikato University professor of biochemistry who identified the extraordinary healing qualities of manuka honey.
Years of world-leading scientific research by Molan and his colleagues at the Waikato Honey Research Unit have spawned a whole industry and rocketed manuka honey out of the bulk food bin and into the high-value medical business.
Although Molan has proved there's something special about manuka honey, even after 20 years of beavering away over the honeycombs and test tubes he can't say exactly what makes it so. He's dubbed the elusive special component "unique manuka factor", or UMF.
But fortunately for the human race and posterity, over the same two decades the honey man has also bent his scientific curiosity and rigorous research methods to searching out and cooking the perfect Christmas mince pie.
You can imagine which one history is going to record as his greatest achievement.
Yes, of course, it's bound to be the pie.
Molan loves Christmas mince pies. Good ones. Ones like his that melt in your mouth.
Hold your store-bought jobs with their too thick, cakey pastry and meagre smear of goo that might once have had a passing acquaintance with a raisin which knew a currant that had flirted with a bit of spice.
In scientific terms, the secret of good pastry is knowing the exact moment of particle cohesion. Or, for the rest of us dough dabblers, when you've added just enough moisture for the flour to stick together just so and no more.
Just as he knew the Ancient Greeks and other long gone folk knew something about the healing properties of honey, so Molan figured that equally ancient types knew a thing or two about fruit mince.
Twenty years ago he started with an existing recipe and applied science. He altered things in a systematic way, keeping thorough records as he increased or decreased ingredients.
"I like to understand the process, but once I've got it right, it doesn't change. You don't fix what isn't broken."
The process identified the "melt in your mouth factor".
Molan put the UMF in honey and now he's put the MIYMF in mince pies, or so his colleagues attest.
His Christmas pies are legendary in the university's biological sciences department, where administrator Vicki Smith describes them as the best she's ever tasted.
"They just melt in your mouth, and the great thing is that he is generous with them," she told On Campus magazine editor Annette Taylor. "He doesn't believe in keeping them to himself."
In the interests of investigative journalism, Taylor knew she had to test the administrator's bold claim. After a special tasting trial the fearless editor was able to give a studied and unbiased opinion.
The pies were "champion fodder", she told her readers.
Alas, I was less fortunate. Each year Molan cooks up his mince pies at home and delivers them around the university.
He's been so busy this year he had to do a rush batch. They seemed to have gone like hot cakes because there was none left to satisfy my inquiring mind - in the interests of investigative journalism.
But I got the recipe.
Dr Molan's splendid Christmas pies
Mincemeat
750g raisins
500g currants
120g chopped almonds
1kg dark brown sugar
4 apples, peeled, seeded and grated
Grated rind of 2 lemons, 2 oranges
6 tsp cinnamon
2 tsp nutmeg
1 tsp cloves
1 tsp almond essence
2 tbsp sherry
Chop the raisins and in a large bowl add the remaining ingredients. Mix together well.
Use straight away, or put in jars. If mixture is on the dry side, add a touch more sherry.
Sweet shortcrust pastry
210g plain flour
1 rounded tsp baking powder
2 heaped tbsp sugar
125g butter
beaten egg
Preheat oven to 220C.
1. Using a food processor on high, mix together the flour, baking powder and sugar. Add the butter and run processor until the mixture is like very fine breadcrumbs, and starting to stick together.
2. Remove from processor and add the egg. Chop this in gently with a knife.
3. When egg is evenly mixed in, gently squeeze the dough together. With as little handling as possible, roll dough out.
4. Cut out rounds with a 7.5cm fluted cutter and then with a 5.5cm cutter. Line oiled pie tray with large rounds, fill with mincemeat. Damp edges of small rounds and place on top. Make a slit in each one. Makes around 12.
5. Bake for around 10 to 15 minutes until golden brown and smelling good. Place on a rack to cool. Dust lightly with icing sugar and share.
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