Linda Herrick: Some couples are a drag

If you had a visitor from overseas and told them the dancing guest on the debut of Maori Television's new comedy series B&B was a new MP, would they believe it? But there he was, Dr Pita Sharples, hamming madly with Hori Ahipene, Te Radar and NZ Idol contender Nik, taking mullet jokes on the chin and quipping awful lines about getting the last cab off the rank.

Cynics may say politicians will do anything for attention but Sharples' presence sat perfectly with B&B's low-budget hokiness and groaning gags. The premise, that it's set in a B&B run by couple Beverley and Bevan (Ahipene and Te Radar), barely matters.

It's just a set-up for some mild explorations of multicultural issues, such as why Pakeha Bevan supported the building of a conference centre on land occupied by a taniwha, but objected to the site being shifted to land occupied by a war memorial. Every culture has its own definition of what's sacred, etc.

If that sounds a bit earnest, B&B is anything but. While it's hardly an example of sophisticated local comedy, it's a good-hearted effort and a showcase for Ahipene's unnerving aptitude for drag.

The jury is still out on Te Radar's aptitude as host of the B&B, however. Far too much emphasis on the "big cock" next door. It's a chook joke. Bang bang!

While Beverley and Bevan aren't exactly the most convincing couple on telly, at least they're a benign pair. The same cannot be said for the dreadful couples who take part in Wife Swap on TV One.

The wives, usually from opposing ends of the economic spectrum, enter each other's marital zone, can't cope with the new temporary husbands and all hell breaks out. One of this week's temp-husbands had a yoga-addicted vegan thrust upon him, and the yob countered by spewing up her nutty (literally) food and roaring like a cornered beast.

He accused her of being a control freak, whereas the real problem was that his tiny fish'n'chip world view was under challenge. Unpleasant viewing.

As is Coronation Street at the moment. I'm sure I'm not the only viewer disturbed by the nasty storyline that's getting worse with each episode. It's the Shelley-Charlie relationship. Everyone in Weatherfield thinks Charlie is a hero because he - lamentably - saved simpering couple Dev and Sunita from the flames, whereas he's really a misogynist psycho who has turned Shelley into a gibbering wreck.

Shelley used to be feisty, even though she's never been the brightest light-bulb in the pub - so why doesn't she tell Charlie to pack up his builder's bag and sod off the next time he says her clothes make her look like a slapper?

Why does she allow him to bully her into not seeing her mother, or demand to know who's on the phone? Because she's co-dependent, even though such a word or concept would not exist in her teeny brain.

Perhaps she has convinced herself that Charlie is wonderful because everyone keeps telling her he is. But Coro is full of mismatched, doomed pseudo-couples: Tyrone and Maria, Steve and Karen, Martin and his teenage tottie, Les and the fat slag. Thank goodness for the Duckworths.

Apparently romance is afoot at some stage - quite a way off, we hope - for Gail. Now that should be something to see after her last fine effort with Richard "Evil" Hillman. Even better, in terms of entertainment, would be a girlfriend for Norris the Doris.