Linda Herrick: Analyse this at 7

What a fascinating display of vaunting egotism and fading charm is being flashed around on the telly at the moment. Such drama. A high-profile career brought low by the lure of money and desperate need for attention. Such comedy. Said celebrity struggles on against insurmountable odds, showing remarkable self-delusion and lack of shame. Such pathos. The calamity of a star who has lost credibility yet still exhibits what's known as pathological egocentricity.

I'm talking, of course, about Lord Jeffrey Archer, the subject of a documentary called What Makes Jeffrey Tick? on the Arts Channel. The programme, using a 16-point list devised by the American Psychiatric Association, analysed the peer's behavioural characteristics and concluded he was a psychopath.

The programme brought back memories of a visit to this fair land by the Lord of Weston-super-Mare, when he snarled, smirked and barked his way through an author's dinner at the Stamford Plaza. Forced to go because of work, I squirmed through the experience; the documentary brought back memories of what a thoroughly unpleasant evening it was. Archer was a nasty little bully, trying to flog one of his puerile pot-boilers to us lowly colonials. Thankfully, he went to jail for perjury shortly afterwards.

The analysis of Archer's character, or lack thereof, conveniently leads to more localised ponderings on the negative pathology of fame, of which we have no better example than the 7pm battle between TV One, Prime and TV3. It has brought out the worst in some people, with name-calling, personal attacks, blustering and hyperbole. And that's just Bill Ralston.

Ralston's rantings about pouring petrol over himself and throwing himself off the highest building in town - if he was the Prime boss - must have induced some head-scratching for Prime's Australian chief executive, Chris Taylor. Do senior news execs behave like that in the Land Downunder? Where women glow and men plunder?

Why Ralston chose to have his outburst against Prime is hard to fathom, a sledgehammer to crush an ant. Then Big Bill turned his eye on to the launch of Campbell Live - and quite lively actually - on TV3. He reckoned 3's execs would be "wetting themselves" - note his fratboy vocabulary - over a slide in ratings of the preceding 3 News.

Such ravings are interesting because it can only mean Ralston is worried, although he would never admit it. Men like him never do. To admit you are a little concerned, feeling a little vulnerable, is to reveal something which is also a little endearing. Humanity.

But that's just being silly. People bursting with humanity are not necessarily attracted to careers in television journalism. There are some exceptions, among them - in this writer's opinion - One's political editor Mark Sainsbury, who makes an excellent and likeable fist of fronting Close Up whenever Susan Wood is away.

Another person who's always won credit for a strict line between reluctant celebrity and private person is John Campbell. Apart from some press he had to do because of the new show, he usually maintains a relatively low profile and stays well away from the women's mags. We cannot say the same of the other two 7pmers.

So, time for everyone to calm down and concentrate on the job. Ungentlemanly public salvos about wankers, petrol, yawning, crap and cock-ups should be held in. Potential outbursters should take heed of What Makes Jeffrey Tick? The American Psychiatric Association's 16 pointers to psychopathy include: lack of shame, poor judgment, failure to learn from experience, risk-taking, impulsivity and recklessness. And poor consistency in work behaviour.