In the women's mags: Tom and Katie on the rocks?

Ever Since Tom Cruise frightened Oprah with his ding-a-ling couch-jumping in the name of Katie Holmes it has been a matter of just how many cover stories we had to wait for the news the greatest love the world had ever seen was on the rocks.

Now finally New Idea tells us the pair are "torn apart" by stubborn pre-nuptial agreement stances.

On one side we have Katie's Catholic divorce lawyer (what the?) father who gives us all some perspective.

"You're pregnant, out of wedlock, to a middle-aged man ... it's not what we had in mind for you," he told Katie, as he drew up papers demanding $320 million of Tom's money if it goes wrong. On the other side we have Tom wanting to protect his fortune from his third ex-wife.

The Woman's Day, though, claims the row has been "blown out of proportion".

Perspective is the theme across the gossip spectrum. The Woman's Weekly promotes a grinning-and-bearing-it Susan Wood and quotes unnamed "friends" of the beleaguered Close Up host in an article that describes her as an even-tempered stunning blonde who would never normally shout at her kids - except when things like a $100,000 salary cut get on top of her.

The Woman's Day has Sharon Osbourne debating whether at 47 Madonna is too old to wear fishnet tights with a purple leotard and the pictures let you make up your own mind.

One of Madonna's friends weighed in with a comment to even things out: "Since when has the wife of a drug-crazed old muso with a wacky family been any sort of moral arbiter?".

Oprah fans will be happy with the Day, as they get two stories - firstly she is going to adopt a Hurricane Katrina orphan. Secondly, she's dancing with Fat Actress Kirsty Alley to shake off some booty.

The Day has the best photo shoot of the lot - Kate Hudson in a red bikini gliding across the sand happy to have made a "curvy comeback" since her scary weight loss post-pregnancy. For the most dramatic before-and-after transformation, though, Kate Winslet, who once vowed never to be a "stick insect", shows up in the Woman's Weekly defiantly rebelling against her "natural" size 14 frame having whittled it back to a size 8.

Not to be outdone, the New Idea came up with the best cover-all-the-bases headline for its sympathetic story about Angelina Jolie "wasting away" under pressure. If we feel too sorry for her, we are reminded: "Man-eater needs a meal".