In the women's mags: How Geri the Spice Girl got pregnant to Sacha

Sacha Gervasi. Who? Indeed. A man dubbed "the Sperm Donor" by both Woman's Weekly and New Idea and "Donor Dad" by Woman's Day is the father of Ginger Spice Geri Halliwell's unborn baby. A British scriptwriter, he could not have written his own exit scene from the relationship better than New Idea: "He then gave her a cool hug and left without finishing his coffee".

All the magazines are getting mileage out of Geri while they can. The Woman's Weekly knows "someone who knows her" who reports: "Geri and relationships do not go together ... she gets so needy that it's suffocating and they run for the hills".

The Day says Geri is "over the moon" about her unplanned baby. We get to see Sacha, who has a grey beard and a faded denim jacket and a worried look on his pudgy face. We learn that he wrote The Terminal, which starred Tom Hanks but before that he was so broke he stole napkins from McDonald's to use as toilet paper.

New Idea has new shots of Jennifer Anniston in an undercover through-the-bushes paparazzi job that has parallels with the Paris Hilton sex tape except Jennifer and lover Vince Vaughn are fully dressed and he is wearing a lumberjack's shirt and she has her hair tied up in a raggy ponytail and they could both do with a haircut. It's like seeing two Westies making out on the steps of Lynmall. But it is still a coup over the other two gossip mags which make do mainly with eyewitness descriptions.

Meanwhile, to add insult to injury, Angelina, who in case you didn't know, stole Jens' husband, is about to be cast as a Bond Girl, reports New Idea.

Will she run off true to form with Daniel Craig the new James Bond? Disappointingly, New Idea missed this obvious angle.

But it redeems itself in a brilliant "supersize me" photo essay containing before and after photos of the Baldwin brothers and their battle with the bloat. Seven years is a long time in Hollywood and it shows on their many chins.

Meanwhile, the Day has Jens and Vince practically married off and says Brad and Angelina could even have married in secret. It turns out a waitress saw a ring on Brad's finger in a restaurant.

Actually there is a lot of hype in the Day - not least Jude Law and Sadie Frost being "on again". How so?

Well: "They have not quite ended up in bed together but there has been a lot of sexual tension".

Both Day and Woman's Weekly enjoy Kirsty Alley's ever-shrinking frame, with the ubiquitous before and after shots. The Weekly reports that Alley told her former lover James Wilder where to go after he decided she was attractive enough now to get a phone call. Sweet revenge.

The Weekly's downhome "exclusive" cover story about Alison Mau's "worst day of my life" is about how awful it was when Paul Holmes' daily current affairs show got axed. We also get to see her in three different wrap dresses.

The Day has a fantastic picture spread on gorgeous Silver Fern Anna Rowberry getting engaged to former All Black beau Jeremy Stanley. He surprised her by turning up unexpectedly when she was in Greece on a girls holiday. The ring in his pocket was a good reason, and she took it well, but hopefully he knows he is never allowed to do that again.