Comedy Q&A: The night Arj Barker's machine ran out of gas

Don't get Arj Barker started on our animal nature

Arj Barker
Unmitigated

Why should we see your show?

Because I've spent the last 15 years of my life doing this so I must be good, or at least really experienced at sucking.

Tell us a joke in 25 words or less.

I cut myself shaving. Now it really hurts when I pee.

Are you funny in real life?

Yes, but not when people say, 'Say something funny'. That's the worst. Just because I do comedy for a living, that doesn't make me your pet monkey.

What makes you laugh out loud?

My remote-controlled fart machine.

Tell us about the time you died on stage.

I was performing in Germany, and my fart machine ran out of batteries during my big closer.

What keeps you awake at night?

The other people in the bar.

What were you like at school?

Scared. Alone.

If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

I am an animal, and that's the problem with humans - we forget that we are but animals.

By failing to recognise that, and thinking ourselves above nature, we become more and more alienated from our true and intended state of being, one of harmony and co-existence with other life on this Earth. It is this trend which will almost certainly be the end of us, if we continue in the direction were heading. Oh wait ... was this supposed to be funny?

* Arj Barker, Unmitigated, The Transmission Room (cnr Mayoral Dr & Queen St), from tonight to May 20, 8.30pm. Bookings at Ticketek (09) 307 5000