What's more nerve-racking than participating in the Paralympics? For Sophie Pascoe, it's her new role on TV. Photo / Tessa Burrows
The incredible athlete and new mum admits she’s nervous about taking on live TV.
Dame Sophie Pascoe admits her latest challenge has her more nervous than she ever was standing on the blocks poised to dive into the pool at four Paralympic Games.
For 12 days during the Paralympics in Paris this month, Sophie will sit behind a desk in TVNZ’s Auckland studios, staring down the barrel of a camera and talking to millions of Kiwis.
Famous for her peerless swimming exploits, winning 19 Paralympic medals for New Zealand, for the first time in 16 years, Sophie won’t be competing – she’ll be hosting TVNZ’s coverage of the sporting event instead.
“I’m pretty much diving into the deep end here being an anchor,” says Sophie, 31. “I’m going into the complete unknown, totally outside of my comfort zone. I thought I could just help out as a guest, but I’m going to be on live TV every night.
“I’m excited, but I’m nervous and I think that’s a good thing because I always know if I’m not nervous before I race, then I never really perform that well.”
It’s been tough for Sophie, our most decorated Paralympian, watching her fellow athletes prepare for the Games, having been there four times in her stellar career. But the 11-time Paralympic gold medallist has a new purpose in life, a more pressing reason to stay home this time – her 6-month-old son.
“There’s a part of me that has absolute FOMO,” the first-time mum admits. “But I know I’m in the exact place I need to be right now – and that’s with him. He’s worth more than any gold medal.
“I’m not Sophie Pascoe to him – I’m Mum. And that’s who I’ll always be.”
Sophie has faced a raft of new challenges in the past year – from severe morning sickness to an emergency Caesarean after a 28-hour labour, plus pressure on her amputated leg and her mental health. Despite it all, she says she’s loving motherhood.
“I thought swimming was hard, but being a mum is definitely the hardest job in the world,” she says. “But I love it.
“I’ve got great support around me and my husband has been wonderful. We’ve got our bundle of joy and he’s such a good baby. It’s amazing watching him grow.”
After two decades of operating on a strict routine as an elite athlete, Sophie admits she’s struggled with the disorder and the curveballs that parenthood serves up.
“Sleep deprivation is another level of the unknown – I’ve never felt anything like it before,” she says. “You have to be able to adapt because one day is just so different to the next and that’s been really hard for me because I’ve been so used to routine my entire swimming career.
“Things got a little bit tough mentally – I’ve had severe depression in the past and we’ve had a lot going on in our lives. We’ve just bought a new house and moved in, and Rob has started his own structural engineering business.”
Sophie has also found her disability has come to the fore as a new mum. Through pregnancy, carrying the extra weight of a baby and swelling affected the stump of her left leg, which was amputated below the knee after a lawnmowing accident at the age of 2.
“It was incredible how painful being pregnant was at times from a disability perspective,” she says. “Now postpartum, I have to make sure I’m safe for my baby to be safe. I have to make sure I put my prosthetic leg on properly. I don’t sleep with it on, so getting up in the night to baby, I have to think about my leg first, then about him. I had to wait to lose my baby weight before getting new legs made, so I’ve lived with the uncomfortableness of that.
“I never thought my disability was going to be an issue, but it’s a daily challenge for me. I have to make sure I’m safe for him.”
But she sees the opportunity to anchor the Paralympic Games coverage as “a bit of a saviour – I feel like I have an identity and a purpose, and I’m still part of the Paralympic movement”.
Sophie will co-host the daily in-studio show in Auckland with Scotty Stevenson, who she knows professionally and personally. He’s interviewed her in the past and their families also spend Christmas holidays camping at Pōhara in Golden Bay.
“I feel really comfortable with Scotty,” she says. “I’ve watched him work and he’s great at understanding what’s going on. He does so much research leading into a big event and that’s really critical for the Paralympic Games. There’s not a lot of background on our Paralympians because they’re not in the media as much as Olympians. That’s where I can bring in my expertise and lift them up not only as athletes, but as people.”
To ensure she’s not plunging in head first, Sophie has been having training sessions with veteran newsreader Wendy Petrie.
“She’s like an idol, right?” enthuses Sophie. “She’s been incredible – giving me all these things to take away and learn. I feel like I’m really well supported by the TVNZ crew.
“I just hope the public goes easy on me because it’s my first time.”
Sophie, Rob and their son will come up from Christchurch to stay in an apartment in Auckland’s inner city during the Games, with Rob’s mum arriving from Fiji to help out while she’s at work.
Sophie is excited to watch the swimming events in Paris and also to see New Zealand’s Paralympic debutants competing.
“The team has incredible leaders, like Cameron Leslie, who’s been to four Paralympic Games now, and Anna Grimaldi,” Sophie says, knowing she will probably be flooded by emotion seeing her friends compete.
Sophie stresses she hasn’t retired from sport yet and won’t rule out swimming at the next Paralympics. She’s been encouraged to dive back into the pool watching mums such as rowers Brooke Francis and Lucy Spoors, Olympic gold medallists in Paris, returning to elite sport.
“We’ve had a lot of mothers paving the way to represent New Zealand after having a baby and being really successful at it,” she says.
She’s back in the pool training alongside her coach, Brett Naylor, and working out at the gym. She often takes her son with her, and has no shortage of “aunties” and members of Team Pascoe to watch over him.
Sophie made the decision quite late not to compete in Paris – after the complications of an emergency Caesarean, followed by an infection, slowed her recovery.
“I set myself very high goals,” she says. “I had to ask, ‘Would I achieve what I wanted to achieve if I went to Paris?’ And if I didn’t, I’d be upset with myself that I put my family through a lot of sacrifice during these really tough, challenging months with a newborn baby.
“And if I went and achieved my goal, would it be enough? I’ve won numerous gold medals at a Paralympic Games and they still haven’t been enough.”
Bouncing her babbling little boy on her knee, she coos, “He’s my enough.”
Photos / Tess Burrows, Karen Triggs, Dame Sophie Pascoe, Swimming NZ and We Dare.