Lockdown can be even harder for couples who are still cohabiting. Photo / 123RF
Lockdown is a strange time for many couples. Some are predicting a baby boom around Christmas — others are expecting the opposite.
"We're seeing a spike of people calling in for initial divorce inquiries," says Katie Spooner, a family law partner at Winckworth Sherwood.
"A lot of people are very unhappy at home, so I think we're going to see a bit of a boom."
With lawyers' offices closed, and courts open for only the most urgent cases, this will mean a lot of divorces being done on Zoom.
Alastair Clifford-Jones, 58, was already a year into divorce proceedings when lockdown restrictions came into place. He had already begun to self-isolate to protect his health, which meant he wasn't able to attend court, and so dialled in. It was the best decision he could have made, coronavirus or not, says Clifford-Jones, a management consultant from Oxfordshire: "I don't think you need to be there at all."
Divorcing remotely helped to suck some of the emotion out of dissolving a marriage of more than 25 years with three grown-up children, he says, though concedes it can be tricky to judge the mood of your ex if you're not in the same room.
"Had I been in court and my wife's lawyer had seen my reaction to some stuff, he would have toned it down a bit," he adds.
Spooner says a lot of the emotional nuance needed during mediation is lost over video calls.
"Over Skype, sometimes there are glitches — so there isn't that same atmosphere."
It can be even harder for couples who are still cohabiting. Many lawyers are catering for the additional demand by advertising how discreet their services can be. Surrey solicitors Herrington Carmichael is offering advice sessions via WhatsApp, which include how to wipe the messages afterwards from your phone's history.
Spooner is "doing a lot of calls with clients on their daily walk" — their only time away from the person they are locked down with.
Coronavirus is making it difficult to settle financial matters, too: divorcing couples aren't able to sell up, which means that some will be stuck under one roof for much longer.
Others are coming to blows over custody arrangements.
"[It's] causing massive issues of passing the children between two houses," says Spooner. "Some are not seeing as much of one of their parents."
But Skype divorces have their perks: "The other day, I did a video link in a lovely silk blouse and yoga leggings," she says.
• Covid19.govt.nz: The Government's official Covid-19 advisory website
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