Aunt Effie: Part 4

By JACK LASENBY

The dogs bared their teeth and growled like gravel boiling in a pot. They scared Daisy who was self-righteous and knew the Bible backwards. Alwyn, who could never walk past a padlock without bellowing at the bull, nor past a dog without barking at it, climbed on to the bed, and the dogs looked surly but moved over for him. The rest of us followed. There was room for everyone on Aunt Effie's enormous bed.

Once we were settled, propped against each other or sprawling lost among eiderdowns, Aunt Effie would groan, "I am dying, Egypt, dying!" She'd reach for a bottle of Old Puckeroo Smelling Salts, pull out the cork with her teeth, take a swig, and sit up straight, hair on end.

Lizzie once asked, "Why do you drink smelling salts, Aunt Effie?" But Aunt Effie didn't hear because of the smoke still coming out her ears as she smacked the cork back in, stuck the bottle under her pillow, and asked, "Do you know how Nelson's Column got its name?"

We chorused, "No! Tell us?" and snuggled down among the blankets, eiderdowns, dogs, and empty medicine bottles.

Publisher: Longacre Press

Price: $16.95

Age group: 9-13 years


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