What we learned from Ellen DeGeneres’ Netflix special

'Ellen DeGeneres: For Your Approval' was filmed in Minneapolis in August. Photo / Netflix, YouTube

Two years after the end of The Ellen DeGeneres Show, the comedian and former talk show host breaks her silence.

Ellen DeGeneres’ characteristics before 2020 were well known: dancing fiend, prankster, lesbian, comedian. She ended every episode of her popular daytime talk show, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, asking her audience to be kind to one another, so when reports alleged a toxic work environment on set, as well as allegations of sexual harassment and misconduct by producers, fans and casual EllenTube watchers alike were shocked.

The allegations went against the image she had cultivated of the silly host who was in one of the most-liked Twitter (now X) selfies of all time. Her breakout role was in prime time on ABC’s Ellen, where she changed 90s TV by coming out as a lesbian herself and having her character come out as well. The homophobic backlash led to Ellen being cancelled and DeGeneres being blacklisted. That is until 2003, when she made her Hollywood return as host for The Ellen DeGeneres Show.

Now, she’s telling her story of getting “kicked out of show business” for being “mean” in her Netflix special For Your Approval, which was filmed at Minneapolis’s Orpheum Theatre in August.

What’s Ellen been up to since her talk show ended?

Raising chickens mostly.

“They lay an egg every day, and as someone who once hosted a daily talk show, I can really appreciate that,” DeGeneres said to applause. “I’m sure they’re thinking: ‘I just laid an egg. I don’t think I can do that again tomorrow.’ And yet, they do.”

Oh, and she no longer gets Botox or filler, and goes to therapy. DeGeneres saw a professional to process all the hatred that was coming her way after nearly two decades of beloved talk show fame. She laments that it wasn’t a typical situation for her therapist, with the doctor once asking, “Ellen, where do you get this idea that everyone hates you?” To which the comic replied, “Well, the New York Times, Washington Post, Entertainment Weekly, Us Weekly.”

Lena Dunham being interviewed on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Photo / File

How does she look back at The Ellen DeGeneres Show now?

The comedian has only fond memories of her cancelled programme, saying that she “loved” the show and everything about it. “It was a family to me,” she states wistfully.

She describes a set full of laughter, fun and games (like the game of tag she started around 2016 that lasted until the show ended). “We played tag, and I would chase people down the hallways. I would chase them all around the studio, and I would scare them all the time. I would jump out, and I would scare people ‘cause I love to do that – and you know, hearing myself say this out loud, I realise I was chasing my employees and terrorising them. I can see where that would be misinterpreted,” she says.

What did she learn about being a boss?

DeGeneres concedes that she was an immature leader, but says she was so because she never wanted to be a boss: “I didn’t go to business school. I went to Charlie Chuckle Hut.” She argues that just because her name fronted the show doesn’t mean that she should’ve been put in charge of the whole production. She relates the situation to the McDonald’s mascot by saying, “I don’t think Ronald McDonald is the CEO of McDonald’s.”

She also claims that everything she knew about being a boss stemmed from movies, but that the media doesn’t show women leading in the same way men do.

How does she look at her downfall?

DeGeneres says that encouraging people to “be kind to one another” at the end of every episode was turned back on her after the allegations surfaced.

The tone of the show caused her to “became a brand, a one-dimensional character who gave stuff away and danced every day up steps”, she says. Other than that concession, she doesn’t directly address any of the rumours about her behaviour in the special.

“Had I ended my show by saying ‘go f*** yourselves,’ people would have been pleasantly surprised to find out I’m kind,” she claims.

What did she say about being ‘kicked out’ of Hollywood?

“We have all these unwritten rules, based on gender, of acceptable behaviour, of who we’re allowed to be, how we’re allowed to act. And if we don’t follow those rules, it makes people uncomfortable. And if people are uncomfortable, there are consequences,” she says. “For those of you keeping score, this is the second time I’ve been kicked out of show business.”

“They say the truth will set you free, and it did: I was free for three years. No one would hire me,” she says. DeGeneres equates her being “kicked out” of Hollywood for allegations of a toxic workplace to when she was blacklisted in the 90s for coming out as a lesbian on Ellen and The Oprah Winfrey Show. Her explanation for the public’s swift abandonment is that her management style did not fit with the rules of how a woman should lead.

What now?

This is allegedly the end of DeGeneres’ time on the silver screen (as Finding Nemo’s Dory) and the TV screen, a place where you’ve been able to find her for three decades.

“I’m happy not being a boss or a brand or a billboard, just a person,” she says near the end of the special. “Just a multifaceted person with different feelings and emotions, and I can be happy and sad and compassionate or frustrated. I have OCD and ADD. I’m honest. I’m generous. I’m sensitive and thoughtful. But I’m tough, and I’m impatient, and I’m demanding. I’m direct. I’m a strong woman.”