If a television soap mirrors the society it is made in, the men of Vanuatu should think about changes.
As portrayed in Love Patrol, series two, which started on Maori Television last Tuesday, Vanuatu blokes are: drunk, lazy, uneducated, hypocritical and foul spreaders of HIV.
However, it's incredibly popular with the locals. Series one, Vanuatu's first locally produced TV programme, was watched by more than 90 per cent of the population of Port Vila when it first aired in 2007.
It has screened in nations across the Pacific, while four episodes of this series were shown at an HIV Aids conference in Bali last year.
That's because its primary goal is to try and educate Pacific Islanders on behaviour leading to HIV infection. A coherent script takes second priority to the "message" - and some sexist characters.
One of Love Patrol's leading men is young unemployed Carlo, who is married to Wendy. When Wendy gets the sulks over their lack of prospects, Carlo casually tells his friend, "You know what girls are like when they get something into their head." You get the feeling that's a saying that has been passed down for many generations.
A cop called Mark, separated for two years from his HIV-positive wife (he gave it to her, what a gift), is furious when she goes public about her condition in the paper. He won't take the tests or admit he is positive himself. Meanwhile, his workmates are so ill-informed they think they'll catch HIV just by sitting in the same patrol car.
The big drama in this new series also centred around an effete Australian "businessman" in cahoots with a corrupt politician. The Aussie is also bankrolling the importation of heroin so it can be couriered on to Australia and New Zealand.
When Carlo found one of the bags of smack washed up on the beach, he took it home, possibly signing his own death sentence. The drama culminated in scenes involving a blow to the head, hostage-taking and the spillage of what looked suspiciously like icing sugar.
The acting in Love Patrol is understandably variable and the scenes chop around unevenly, but it's an interesting insight into life in a Pacific "paradise". The scenes of a bored kid scratching at the dirt with a stick instead of going to school said it all.
Yesterday being World Aids Day, Maori TV last night also screened The Lazarus Effect, a succinct 30-minute documentary by Lance Bangs on the impact of ARV drugs distributed by free clinics across Zambia.
Stunningly shot - Africa looks bright and beautiful - the programme centred around a woman called Constance Mudenda who works in clinics in Lusaka and by sheer force of personality encourages HIV sufferers to come in for tests, support and treatment.
Constance was herself HIV positive and lost all three of her children to the virus. A teenage boy told a heartbreaking story of losing his entire family, and there were horrendous photos of emaciated kids.
The good news was that those very same kids were holding the photos, months after being on ARV, healthy and sparkling.
The Lazarus Effect revealed that the hideously expensive drugs were reversing the ravages of HIV but the people and their governments can't afford them.
The ARV drug programme is funded by the UN, the Red programme (which helped make this show) and the US Pepfar scheme. People like Mudenda work on other aspects of treatment, like overcoming shyness, embarrassment and social stigma.
It was an unpatronising and encouraging show - but 4000 people across Africa still die from HIV/Aids each day. They haven't got access to the drugs.
-TimeOut
TV Eye: Airing tropical issues
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