Tis the season

The What Now? crew head to Samoa to help kids who are still suffering as a result of the tsunami. Photo / Supplied

Prepare for a TV sugar-high this week. Endless Santa movies, animated yuletide specials, Christmas cooking shows and festive themed (repeat) episodes of sitcoms litter the lineup. We've sorted the wheat from the chaff - so that you don't have to.

Prelude

Christmas comes early to TV2 - from today. At 8am there is a special feel-good Christmas edition of kids' show What Now? featuring the usual suspects on a mission to Samoa to help children affected by the tsunami. Merry Madagascar, the first of the channel's made-for-TV animated specials spun off from recent hit movies, kicks off at 7pm, followed by Tim Allen donning the big red suit in the popular family comedy The Santa Clause at 7.30pm. However if you're in the mood for something a bit tarter, why not check out a repeat of Lost In Austen (TV One, 8.30pm - concluding Monday), a bright and breezy riff on the classic romance Pride & Prejudice. For the season's cynics there's always a foul-mouthed Billy Bob Thornton as Bad Santa back over on TV2 at 9.30pm, followed by Tim Burton's clever stop-motion tale, The Corpse Bride, relegated to the graveyard slot at 11.20pm.

On Monday, Ponsonby's Franklin Road residents will no doubt be green with envy at the over-the-top efforts of the crazy folk featured in documentary Invasion of The Christmas Lights (TV3, 7.30pm). But war will probably break out for control of the remote control in many households given that The Wedding Singer (TV2) and The Fast And The Furious (TV3) are duking it out at 8.30pm.

Tuesday should see TV2's Neighbours fans going on high alert as the soap's last episode of the year screens at 6pm, while the littlies can be settled down for the animated spinoff Kung Fu Panda: Secrets of the Furious Five (at 7pm). Tougher choices are needed for 7.30pm: Coronation Street residents will need their last pre-Christmas fix (TV One), yet fans of floppy-haired celebrity chef Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall will also want to see how he celebrates a full-on River Cottage Christmas (Prime). But if you're in search of some vacuous fun you've not been forgotten, either: Hotel Babylon (TV One, 8.30pm) sees the exit of one veteran staffer and the return of another.

On Wednesday, claymation duo Wallace & Gromit are back for another repeat adventure (TV2, 7pm). That's followed by Christmas-themed repeats of the inexplicably popular Two And A Half Men (7.30pm) - featuring a guest appearance by former Charles In Charge child star Josie Davis as a Martha Stewart wannabe - and The Big Bang Theory (8pm). At 8.30pm it's decision time again: movie Forrest Gump (TV2, 8.30pm), Robson Green and Mark Benton in Clash Of The Santas (TV One, 8.35pm), or local stand-up comedy AotearoHa! Dai's Xmas Special (TV3, 8.30pm)?

Christmas Eve

TV3 gets in early with special programming. Among its lineup of family-friendly entertainment, look for the films Millions (10.10am), Hannah Montana: Best Of Both Worlds (3pm), A Knight's Tale (7pm), and Bridget Jones's Diary (9.40pm).

Meanwhile, TV2 has a manic Mike Myers in the colourful slapstick movie Dr Seuss' Cat In The Hat (5pm), and a new Disney animated feature about a dissatisfied elf in Prep And Landing (7pm). Later at 7.30pm, Jack Frost and Santa do battle in The Santa Clause 3, but despite it also having Tim Allen in it you'll want to skip the dismal Christmas With The Kranks that follows at 9.25pm. Trust us. For those willing to stay up late, however, there's a treat for fans of 90s sitcom Ellen - a marathon screening of her yuletide specials, from 12.45am.

Over on TV One, the greatest, albeit revolting-sounding festive feasts from history are dished up for the celebrity guests on Heston's Christmas Feasts (TV One, 7.30pm). Stick around afterwards at 8.35pm and you can also see local lass Keisha Castle-Hughes as mum to baby Jesus in The Nativity Story.

Christmas Day

It wouldn't be Christmas in New Zealand without repeats of age-old movies - and the channels have once again obliged. The Sound Of Music (TV3, 1.15pm), The Wizard of Oz (TV One, 1.35pm), Mary Poppins (TV One, 3.40pm) and yes, The Shawshank Redemption (TV One, 8.30pm) have once again made it into the line-up. Prime offers only one movie on Christmas Day - the Mel Brooks' spoof Robin Hood: Men In Tights at 2.50pm - but TV2's schedule is jam-packed. Worth searching out is the slightly creepy early "performance capture" film Polar Express (5pm), cute Happy Feet (7.25pm), and the corny but effective Last Holiday (9.10pm) starring Queen Latifah. And it may be a repeat, but Shrek The Halls at 7pm will also amuse. It has all the star voices and production values of the big-screen franchise but less fairy-tale mischief and more domestic comedy than the original.

TV3 also sticks largely to movies. Highlights include: SpongeBob Squarepants Movie (7.05am), and Robin Williams does drag in Mrs Doubtfire (7pm). Hollywood hunk Gerard Butler tries and fails to hit the high notes in the 2004 version of Phantom Of The Opera at 9.05pm but tune in later at 11.15pm for American Dreamz, a biting spoof of American Idol phenomenon - with Hugh Grant ideally cast as a cynical Simon Cowell-styled presenter.

Traditionalists can tune in at 6.50pm to the brief Queen's Christmas Message on TV One, followed by something homegrown at 7.30pm - Carols In The Caves (Waitomo, that is).

C4 finally comes to the party, too. There's Ten Years Of: Christmas No 1s at 5pm, the hilarious Star Wars spoof Family Guy: Blue Harvest at 7.30pm, followed by old reliable Airplane (aka Flying High) at 8.15pm.

Boxing Day

Schedules are virtually back to normal on Saturday but there's a sense of impending doom over on TV2 what with repeats of Armageddon (8.30pm) and The Sixth Sense (11.35pm).

If you fancy a chuckle though, you'll have to choose at 7.30pm between the gentle larrikin Aussie humour of The Castle on TV One or Adam Sandler in Big Daddy.