The Diary: What I know about women

All Black Dan Carter acknowledges that women are different but says (most of the time) he can't live without them. Photo / Christine Cornege

The Diary asked some famous Kiwi men to share their thoughts about the opposite sex.

Dan Carter, All Black and Crusader
Women. So different to the simple male. Some days you just can't live with them, but other days you can't live without them.

Jeremy Corbett, 7 Days host
I know that women are not from Venus. That planet is shrouded in sulphuric acid and has an atmospheric pressure 92 times that of Earth's. I find it is unlikely that's where they came from.

Ben Mitchell, Shortland St actor
I don't know a hell of a lot about women. I'm fascinated by them but they are a confusing bunch. If I had figured them out by now, I might be married. Does anyone know if there is a book on this subject that I can purchase? I think I might need to do some more reading on the subject matter before I answer properly.

Mark Richardson, Crowd Goes Wild presenter
What do I know about women? Well, I know Dr Oz could solve a lot of their extra health issues if he just advised then to stop holding their farts in. I know Dr Phil is filling them up with false hope. And I know Oprah just needs to STOP IT. What she did to Tom Cruise, a great action hero, was inexcusable. What I really know is that women need to listen to me more because I can fix their problems.

Justin Brown, Classic Hits host
Women are more open-minded and easier to chat to. They also do many things better than men, like breast-feeding and parking. I live with three of them (including two daughters) and they all have style, spunk and grace. My mother is one of the funniest people I know (I must be adopted) and has great values that I try to take on board.

Stephen McIvor, Sky Sport presenter
Women can be complicated to understand, but one thing's for sure, we need them as friends and wives and mothers to our children.

Benny Castles, fashion designer
I was at boarding school throughout my adolescence. I lived, breathed, slept, showered, ate, schooled and sported with around 70 other young men. For some, a dream result - not for me. We lacked proper and adult supervision and when the birds and the bees topic was on the table for discussion, there was no tried and tested knowledge to go with. However, there were plenty of opinions and gross exaggerations. Among the numerous pieces of advice that was offered, one piece stuck with me and may sum up my total knowledge of male and female relations. It was from a wise and thoughtful 7th Former, who said: "Chicks are like dudes, they just don't get cricket."

Dom Harvey, The Edge host
What do I know about women? Lots. I'm practically a lady myself. I love bubble baths and French pear scented Ecoya candles. And I'd always choose a good day spa over a game of paintball. I draw the line at sitting down to pee, though, unless I'm hungover, in which case, sitting down just seems way easier.

Dominic Bowden, X Factor presenter
No one does passion and commitment like women. During our live [X Factor] shows, that mosh pit is full to the brim almost exclusively with females. They're making the signs, they're screaming on cue. When Fletcher did a radio interview, a dozen girls turned up to meet him. I keep telling Moorhouse, Benny, Fletcher, all the guys, keep those girls happy and they'll never let you down. You'll be here 'til the end. However, I'm still waiting for the Dom signs and greeting party to arrive. Sure they'll turn up this week. Thanks Mum.

Jono Pryor, Jono and Ben at Ten
Women. They think nine minutes ahead of men. They love being called "love". In Thailand they are hard to pick.

Jason Reeves, Classic Hits host
Women can say so much more with one look than most guys can say in a whole sentence.

Andrew Mulligan, The Rock/Crowd Goes Wild presenter
Women are delicate creatures with high expectations and should be treated with respect. They can also be difficult and moody. This is not from experience, this is from Facebook.

Matt Heath, Hauraki host
Women often smell nice. They love food crazes like raw baking. I know the Queen is one and so is my mum, and my girlfriend too. Women are probably nicer than men. They are much less likely to punch you in the face. They don't like it when you spend more than five hours on Xbox.