Nick returned in Shortland Street's 25th anniversary special tonight. Photo / Supplied
BREAKING: Mount Ferndale has erupted, engulfing the town in a deadly cloud of ash and totally ruining Chris Warner's 50th birthday party. The Spinoff's Calum Henderson bring you a chronological selection of the best lines of dialogue from tonight's one-liner-filled special episode.
"This hospital's gone to rack and ruin since I left" - original receptionist Marjorie Brasch on the state of it
"Oh, you squashed my peonies" - Stuart Neilson after Harper squashed his peonies (they later kissed!)
"We're all just hanging on by a thread" - Dark Chris Warner
"God can't save you now" - a hired goon beating the crap out of someone called 'Hawks', seconds before a friggen volcano erupted... saving him
"Our baby is being born in a freaking car" - Lucy, giving birth to a baby in a freaking car
"Last time I was stuck in this lift I had a dicky tummy ... this time I've got a dicky ticker" - Marj, again, stuck in a lift, again
"Just little bits of history repeating" - Shirley Bassey and Propellerheads back in '98, somehow foretelling this episode
"Bit of a headache or blood squirting out your eyes?" - Nick manning the reception desk
"Will uncle Boyd die?" - TK's kid calmly watching Boyd spew up some kind of black tar
"Just a plain wicker casket and Kiri Te Kanawa" - Marj planning her funeral
"I'm pinching back a panic poo" - Damo from IT re: needing the toilet
"Tell me where my sister is or I'll rip ya head off and spit down ya neck" - Chris Warner's son Frank threatening a hired good
"I'm a mountain Sarah - sometimes I explode" - supervillain Mason Coutts after murdering Frank
"It's the mountain, Boyd, the deep Dionysian truth" - Eve dropping an Easter egg for the academics
"Mate, I don't know you, and you've got sick on your shoes" - Lionel Skeggins to Chris Warner, seconds after Waverley vomited on his shoes
"I'm pregnant as anything - again!" - Waverley to Nick
"Yes, I'm a sperm volcano!" - Nick to Waverley
"Nick Harrison, You can use the s-word at home but not in a public hospital" - Marj's second-last words
"Life's too short and wonderful for regrets" - Marj's last words
- This story appears in The Spinoff and has been republished with permission
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