Aaron's still in the game, so why is he whining? asks Steve Braunias. Photo / Supplied
Aaron's still in the game, so why is he whining? asks Steve Braunias. Photo / Supplied
The douche abides. High drama in last night's anthropological study of the mating habits of the New Zealand drongo, The Bachelorette, as two of the contestants were sent packing from their base in Buenos Aires – but Drongo Aaron, widely considered a douchebag, kept his place.
"I said I was alright but I wasn't alright," he said afterwards, with a distinct tone in his voice. It wasn't a tone of relief, as you might expect. Only minutes earlier the guy had cried into his beer at the prospect he was on his way out the door. He'd even packed his suitcase. But he was told he could stay, that he was still in the game. And yet he sounded like he was sorry for himself. He sounded like he was doing the very thing that he had slandered Drongo Marc with: whining.
Logan and George comfort Aaron as he cries into his beer. Photo / Supplied
There's something wrong with Drongo Aaron. This is the same guy who last week caused a major ruckus when he tittle-tattled on Drongo Steve, and told Hottie Lesina that he was a secret smoker. Drongo Steve was not amused. Drongo Steve was like a bear with a sore head. Drongo Steve over-reacted and made a bit of a fool of himself, but he had a point. Drongo Aaron had gone behind his back.
But if there's one thing worse than bagging someone behind their back, it's bagging someone to their face.
"I heard you said I was annoying," Drongo Marc challenged Drongo Aaron.
Drongo Marc nodded, and was ready to move on, but Drongo Aaron hadn't finished. He needed to set the record straight.
"I said you were whiney," he announced, as if that was some kind of improvement.
Drongo Marc refrained from the very thing he'd just been slandered with: whining. He wasn't happy about it, and denied the charge, but kept his thoughts to himself.
Conor knew his time had come. Photo / Supplied
It was a very classy response from a guy who carries himself with a lot of dignity. There's a lot to Drongo Marc. He looks out for people. Actually he looks out mainly for himself, but he sees the big picture, and has a code of conduct.
Drongo Aaron doesn't have a code of conduct. He blunders in, a Trump let loose on a dating show, whining and accusing and kissing.
A pox on Drongo Aaron. And a perfunctory, inevitable farewell for the two quiet and unassuming drongos sent home last night, Conor and Flynn. They never really had much of a chance. Flynn didn't seem to have a personality and Conor kept promising that when the time was right he'd show his personality but either the time was never propitious or he didn't have anything to show.
You can only keep people guessing for so long. He knew his number was up and his face expressed little surprise when he heard the words every contestant on The Bachelorette fears: hasta la vista, drongo.
